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Do good things for other people.

David Letterman

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David Letterman
Age: 77
Born: 1947
Born: April 12
Actor
Comedian
Journalist
Talk Show Host
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Weather Presenter
Writer
Indianapolis
Indiana
David Michael Letterman
Earl Hofert
Good
Things
People

More quotes by David Letterman

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People say we need royalty. We have royalty in the United States - the Kardashians.
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Nothing, believe me, nothing is more satisfying to me personally than getting a great idea and then beatin' it to death.
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President Obama is going to take two weeks to unwind, as opposed to President Bush, who never wound.
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Here in New York City you can now walk around smoking weed and all they will do if they see you is write you a ticket. Unfortunately, the ticket will be to a Jets game.
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How about that oil slick in the Gulf of Mexico. And you know, the oil slick is going everywhere. So the next time somebody lands on the Hudson, it won't be that big a deal.
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A lot of folks are still demanding more evidence before they actually consider Iraq a threat. For example, France wants more evidence. And you know I'm thinking, the last time France wanted more evidence they rolled right through Paris with the German flag.
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Rick Perry, started out like a ball of fire from Texas and then he started to drop and now he's retooling. He's adding advisers to his campaign team. This guy had advisers? Really?
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There are a lot of New York City Thanksgiving traditions. For example, a lot of New Yorkers don't buy the frozen Thanksgiving turkey. They prefer to buy the bird live and then push it in front of a subway train.
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The Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade has new balloons this year including the Pillsbury Doughboy balloon and the first openly gay balloon. Also the Thomas Tank Engine balloon, and they even have the Ebola nurse balloon.
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Finally we got some good news about the economy. Barack Obama got $800 billion to rescue the economy. All I can say is, 'Thank you, Oprah.'
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We make a lot of fun at President Clinton's expense. But this transition is going to be tough because it's been 25 years since this guy has gotten laid in the private sector.
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You've got to be careful smoking weed. It causes memory loss. And also, it causes memory loss.
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Sunday is the Academy Awards. Every time an actor says, 'I didn't expect this,' Ruth Bader Ginsburg will do a shot.
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Night clubs scare me. They're dark and they stink and they're dangerous and everybody's drunk.
David Letterman
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Newt Gingrich is against same-sex marriage. Well, actually, he's against same-marriage sex.
David Letterman
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There are so many flavors of Coke now - Coke with lemon, Coke with vanilla, Coke with lime, Cherry Coke, and they've just brought out another new flavor - Coke with Pepsi.
David Letterman
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Bush explained his strategy for transfer of power. It's a two part plan. Part one: clean out his desk. Part two: rent a U-Haul.
David Letterman
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New Orleans: The least annoying French place on Earth.
David Letterman
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The last time the French asked for 'more proof' it came marching into Paris under a German flag
David Letterman
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Incredible experience, watching a baby birth on the internet. It's now my screensaver.
David Letterman