Share
×
Inspirational Quotes
Authors
Professions
Topics
Tags
Quote
The CIA special unit that was searching for Osama bin Laden has been disbanded. So I guess, mission accomplished.
David Letterman
Share
Change background
T
T
T
Change font
Original
TAGS & TOPICS
David Letterman
Age: 77
Born: 1947
Born: April 12
Actor
Comedian
Journalist
Talk Show Host
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Weather Presenter
Writer
Indianapolis
Indiana
David Michael Letterman
Earl Hofert
Laden
Units
Searching
Mission
Missions
Accomplished
Disbanded
Guess
Cia
Special
Unit
More quotes by David Letterman
President Obama has two years left as president. I wouldn't be surprised if he gets to appoint two new Kardashian husbands.
David Letterman
But down in Florida in the early voting, there were computer glitches, confusing ballots, long lines and chaos. And when President Bush heard about this, he said, 'Mission accomplished!'
David Letterman
They found a scrapbook with photos of Osama bin Laden from the '90s, and they're studying each and every photo very, very closely. My favorite shot of Osama bin Laden was right between the eyes.
David Letterman
We thought New York City was home to 8 million rats. Turns out, that's a little high. The actual number is 2 million rats. That explains the light turnout for the midterm elections.
David Letterman
All comedians are preoccupied with one thing and with one thing only-themmm-selllves. It's a horrible lot in life.
David Letterman
A guy in Pennsylvania was arrested because he was drunk in his golf cart going from bar to bar. So they arrested him. I said: Wait a minute. Isn't that golf?
David Letterman
Stocks are at an all-time high today. I don't have any money in the stock market. I don't have the stomach for the ups and downs. So about 20 years ago I put all of my money and liquid assets into videotape rewind machines.
David Letterman
Fall is my favorite season in Los Angeles, watching the birds change color and fall from the trees.
David Letterman
Did you see Howard Dean ranting and raving? Here's a little tip Howard - cut back on the Red Bull.
David Letterman
It's official, Arnold said he will enter the race for governor. At least that's what everybody thinks he said.
David Letterman
Mitt Romney is not going to be running for president. So you know what that means. We are getting closer and closer to 'President Trump.'
David Letterman
Yesterday was not only daylight saving time, but also International Women's Day. What better way to address the issue of inequality for women than giving them a day that's missing an hour.
David Letterman
Did you hear about this genius that got on a plane and set fire to his feet? Turns out he had bombs in his shoes and the problem all started when the flight attendants asked him nicely to extinguish his feet. He was wearing exploding sneakers. The new Nike Air-Jihads!
David Letterman
Security here in New York City is still very tight. Hookers in Times Square now are demanding two forms of fake ID.
David Letterman
America is the only country where a significant proportion of the population believes that professional wrestling is real but the moon landing was faked.
David Letterman
What we know about Osama Bin Laden is this: he's worth $300 million, he has five wives and twenty-six kids -- and he hates Americans for their excessive lifestyle.
David Letterman
Child labor, not a problem. Censorship, not a problem. Torture, not a problem. Chewing gum in China - oh, my God! You better not be over here chewing gum.
David Letterman
Republicans are having trouble luring Gov. Chris Christie into the presidential race. They should try pie.
David Letterman
Mitt Romney has a fund-raiser. He's going to get in the ring and fight Evander Holyfield. This is the dumbest thing Republicans have done since they wrote that open letter to Iran.
David Letterman
Mitt Romney and his family have a big two-day weekend plan. They're going to hike to the top of his money.
David Letterman
