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In Hollywood, Oscar is king.

David Letterman

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David Letterman
Age: 77
Born: 1947
Born: April 12
Actor
Comedian
Journalist
Talk Show Host
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Weather Presenter
Writer
Indianapolis
Indiana
David Michael Letterman
Earl Hofert
Oscars
King
Kings
Hollywood
Oscar

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Newt Gingrich's campaign is broke. All the money gone. So now he's charging $50 for a photo. And for $100 you can marry him.
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There are so many flavors of Coke now - Coke with lemon, Coke with vanilla, Coke with lime, Cherry Coke, and they've just brought out another new flavor - Coke with Pepsi.
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Political pundits are saying President George W. Bush has made gains in two key states: dazed and confused.
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Valentine's Day money-saving tips: Break up on February 13th, get back together on the 15th. In place of bubble bath, use lavender-scented dish-washing liquid. Forget rose petals. Sprinkle the bed with sliced beets!
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I went through one period when I smoked a surprising, a really breath-taking, amount of grass almost every night.
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Someone did a study of the three most-often-heard phrases in New York City. One is Hey taxi. Two is What train do I take to get to Bloomingdales? And three is Don't worry, it's only a flesh wound.
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Stocks are at an all-time high today. I don't have any money in the stock market. I don't have the stomach for the ups and downs. So about 20 years ago I put all of my money and liquid assets into videotape rewind machines.
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Weak coffee is the greatest sin against humanity.
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The creepy stuff was that I have had sex with women who worked for me on this show. Now, my response to that is yes I have. I have had sex with women who worked on this show. Would it be embarrassing if it were made public? Perhaps it would, especially for the women.
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A small handgun makes any TV remote control.
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Child labor, not a problem. Censorship, not a problem. Torture, not a problem. Chewing gum in China - oh, my God! You better not be over here chewing gum.
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The FCC has delayed the decision on the Time/Warner Comcast merger. So how do you think those folks like being put on hold?
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So the guy who shot Gadhafi was wearing a Yankees cap. Did you see that? If he'd had a Boston Red Sox hat on he probably would have missed.
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John Boehner - doesn't he look like every guy you've ever seen at a hotel bar? He looks like the kind of guy who licks his thumb when he counts his money.
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There's already been some trouble for Osama bin Laden in the afterlife. There was a mix up and he was greeted by 72 vegans.
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Did you see Howard Dean ranting and raving? Here's a little tip Howard - cut back on the Red Bull.
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Well, the manhunt continues for that elusive evil mastermind, but I'm telling you Enron CEO Kenneth Lay remains at large.
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A priest in New York City was arrested on gun possession. These days, you better be happy that the bulge in his pocket is a .38.
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Hillary is in Iowa to listen to what the people are saying - because if you want her to speak, that will cost you $200,000. So she's there listening.
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Mitt Romney has a fund-raiser. He's going to get in the ring and fight Evander Holyfield. This is the dumbest thing Republicans have done since they wrote that open letter to Iran.
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