Quote

Mitt Romney is not going to run for president. Mitt said it's time for fresh faces. So that's good news for Bruce Jenner.

David Letterman

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

David Letterman
Age: 77
Born: 1947
Born: April 12
Actor
Comedian
Journalist
Talk Show Host
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Weather Presenter
Writer
Indianapolis
Indiana
David Michael Letterman
Earl Hofert
Going
Bruce
Good
Mitt
Time
Romney
Fresh
News
Faces
President
Running
Jenner

More quotes by David Letterman

Image
The big debate right now is if Saddam is alive or dead. He's dead, then he's alive, then dead, then alive. It's just confusing. Today they showed videotape, and Saddam was speaking at his own funeral.
David Letterman
Image
When I stopped smoking cigars it was the biggest mistake I made in my life. So my resolution for 98 is Im going to start smoking cigars again. I gave them up about a year and a half ago, and I now realize that it may have been my one last fun, interesting thing to do.
David Letterman
Image
Someone did a study of the three most-often-heard phrases in New York City. One is Hey taxi. Two is What train do I take to get to Bloomingdales? And three is Don't worry, it's only a flesh wound.
David Letterman
Image
Donald Trump is on the show tonight. Donald is a big man, I think 230 pounds -- 235 with cologne.
David Letterman
Image
You know, Sarah Palin is the Governor of Alaska, you know that. And she's a lifelong member of the National Rifle Association. So great, is what I'm thinking, another vice president that shoots a drinking buddy just get ready.
David Letterman
Image
We thought New York City was home to 8 million rats. Turns out, that's a little high. The actual number is 2 million rats. That explains the light turnout for the midterm elections.
David Letterman
Image
Mayor de Blasio said that whenever he goes to a Yankee game he gets sick and tired of people booing and giving him the finger. Hey, what do you want? You're the mayor of New York City. It comes with the gig, pal.
David Letterman
Image
You can't eat tomatoes because they're tainted with deadly salmonella. First there was tainted lettuce. Now, tainted tomatoes. Who would have thought that the healthiest part of a B.L.T. would be the bacon?
David Letterman
Image
Hillary Clinton is now in Iowa. She's spending every waking minute of her day meeting ordinary people, and it's to prepare her for a job in which she will never again meet an ordinary person.
David Letterman
Image
President Obama has two years left as president. I wouldn't be surprised if he gets to appoint two new Kardashian husbands.
David Letterman
Image
The last time the French asked for 'more proof' it came marching into Paris under a German flag
David Letterman
Image
Mitt Romney said he's not concerned about the very poor. What he means is people making less than a million.
David Letterman
Image
President Bush announced that the war in Iraq has been won. It's all over, it's been won. I believe this would be Bush's first uncontested victory.
David Letterman
Image
They say the oil spill has the potential to kill more wildlife than a Sarah Palin hunting trip.
David Letterman
Image
Tim Tebow has been on the bench longer than Ruth Bader Ginsburg.
David Letterman
Image
But down in Florida in the early voting, there were computer glitches, confusing ballots, long lines and chaos. And when President Bush heard about this, he said, 'Mission accomplished!'
David Letterman
Image
I got some good news earlier today before the show. Thanks to Alex Rodriguez, I am no longer the most overpaid disappointment in New York City.
David Letterman
Image
I think the number one public-relations blunder Osama has made is that he lives in a cave-fortress and if there's one thing we've learned from it's that you can't trust a guy who lives in a cave-fortress -- Lex Luther, Captain Nemo, Dr. Evil. I'm telling you the list goes on.
David Letterman
Image
The Mars Polar Lander has been quieter than George W. Bush after a foreign policy question.
David Letterman
Image
I got a call from my mom today, she says, 'Well, David, I see you didn't get the 'Tonight Show' again.'
David Letterman