Quote

Sunday is the Academy Awards. Every time an actor says, 'I didn't expect this,' Ruth Bader Ginsburg will do a shot.

David Letterman

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

David Letterman
Age: 77
Born: 1947
Born: April 12
Actor
Comedian
Journalist
Talk Show Host
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Weather Presenter
Writer
Indianapolis
Indiana
David Michael Letterman
Earl Hofert
Expect
Actor
Bader
Says
Ruth
Actors
Academy
Didn
Awards
Every
Sunday
Time
Shot
Shots

More quotes by David Letterman

Image
How about that oil slick in the Gulf of Mexico. And you know, the oil slick is going everywhere. So the next time somebody lands on the Hudson, it won't be that big a deal.
David Letterman
Image
Here's why Sarah Palin says she won't be running for president. She says she can be more effective at getting others elected by not running. And I thought, well, that's true, because in 2008 she got Obama elected.
David Letterman
Image
I don't like stand-up comedy that requires a lot of props. I really respect people who can walk out onstage alone and with no other tool but their own minds and can make you laugh and maybe even think a little.
David Letterman
Image
Today, the L.A. Times accused Arnold Schwarzenegger of groping six women. I'm telling ya, this guy is presidential material.
David Letterman
Image
If Ricky Schroder and Gary Coleman had a fight on television with pool cues, who would win? 1) Ricky Schroder 2) Gary Coleman 3) The television viewing public
David Letterman
Image
President Bush has been silent on Schwarzenegger. Of course, he can't pronounce Schwarzenegger.
David Letterman
Image
Well, the manhunt continues for that elusive evil mastermind, but I'm telling you Enron CEO Kenneth Lay remains at large.
David Letterman
Image
The oil spill is getting bad. There is so much oil and tar now in the Gulf of Mexico, Cubans can now walk to Miami.
David Letterman
Image
Chi-Os were ideal partners for all occasions. They were discrete, desirable, tactful, polite, and fun... Every mom dreamed of her son coming home with a Chi Omega, a woman's woman.
David Letterman
Image
I always liked Mitt Romney. He looks like the salesman who follows you around at Brooks Brothers.
David Letterman
Image
We're learning more about Osama bin Laden. His father was married 16 times, and he has five wives. I think we're getting to the root of his intense anger. And they say bin Laden never spends the night in the same place twice. No, wait a minute, that's Clinton.
David Letterman
Image
The new 'Mad Max' movie takes place in a post-apocalyptic world. I have a small part in 'Mad Max.' I play the old geezer who remembers what steak tasted like.
David Letterman
Image
John Boehner - doesn't he look like every guy you've ever seen at a hotel bar? He looks like the kind of guy who licks his thumb when he counts his money.
David Letterman
Image
I don't like jokes about sex or bodily functions or drug use or the difference between New York and L.A. I never do any of that.
David Letterman
Image
It is cold down in Washington, DC. They had to use an ice scraper on John Boehner's face to get the tears off, it was so cold.
David Letterman
Image
I got a call from my mom today, she says, 'Well, David, I see you didn't get the 'Tonight Show' again.'
David Letterman
Image
Now all of us can talk to the NSA -- just by dialing any number.
David Letterman
Image
Every day is President's Day when you have an intern!
David Letterman
Image
It's the first day of spring. That means this weekend I'll take down my Christmas lights.
David Letterman
Image
Why we are here: To tremble at the terrible beauty of the stars, to shed a tear at the perfection of Beethoven's symphonies, and to crack a cold one now and then.
David Letterman