Quote

The ayatollah in Iran says he believes that he got the letter, but he thinks he accidentally threw it out with his Crate & Barrel catalog.

David Letterman

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

David Letterman
Age: 77
Born: 1947
Born: April 12
Actor
Comedian
Journalist
Talk Show Host
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Weather Presenter
Writer
Indianapolis
Indiana
David Michael Letterman
Earl Hofert
Iran
Crate
Letters
Catalog
Thinks
Barrel
Says
Accidentally
Believe
Barrels
Thinking
Threw
Letter
Believes
Ayatollah

More quotes by David Letterman

Image
It's official, Arnold said he will enter the race for governor. At least that's what everybody thinks he said.
David Letterman
Image
Newt Gingrich wants to build a colony on the Moon. OK, you say, but why? Well, he wants to be the first American to get divorced on the Moon.
David Letterman
Image
Now there are reports that Osama bin Laden would like to commit suicide on television. This is the kind of lead-in I have been praying for every since I came to CBS. Bin Laden is planning a televised suicide or, as I call it, hosting the Academy Awards.
David Letterman
Image
Don't use your bedroom for work, unless you're a prostitute.
David Letterman
Image
You know you've had too much to eat for Christmas dinner when you slump down onto a beanbag and realize... there is no beanbag.
David Letterman
Image
Did you get the new iPhone yet? The iPhone that I have is outdated. It has two pieces and a hand crank.
David Letterman
Image
Herman Cain was unaware that China is a nuclear power. And I said to myself, 'Hey, Herman, how about making an unwanted advance on a history book?'
David Letterman
Image
Any online gamblers here? Well, Congress is looking in shutting that down.There's going to be a massive congressional investigation of online gambling and they're going to shut it down. And when they get done with that, they're going to look into this North Korean thing.
David Letterman
Image
Good luck finding a place to park in New York City. And when you do, good luck figuring out the parking signs, restrictions, and prohibitions. It is so complicated. It has gotten so bad, I never park my car without a lawyer.
David Letterman
Image
You can't eat tomatoes because they're tainted with deadly salmonella. First there was tainted lettuce. Now, tainted tomatoes. Who would have thought that the healthiest part of a B.L.T. would be the bacon?
David Letterman
Image
I don't like stand-up comedy that requires a lot of props. I really respect people who can walk out onstage alone and with no other tool but their own minds and can make you laugh and maybe even think a little.
David Letterman
Image
Weak coffee is the greatest sin against humanity.
David Letterman
Image
President Obama went to India, South Korea, then Japan. He's going to keep travelling until he finds his birth certificate.
David Letterman
Image
Mitt Romney is doing what he can. He's trying very hard. He wants to unite America, the rich with the wealthy, the poor with the indigent, and the white with the Caucasian.
David Letterman
Image
They're doing everything they can to tighten security at the White House. Today, on the roof of the White House, they added one of those fake owls.
David Letterman
Image
Last month Mitt Romney raised $76 million. He found it in an old sport-coat pocket.
David Letterman
Image
Mitt Romney had a horse competing in the Olympics. He didn't win. But next year, he'll be competing in 'Dancing with the Stars.'
David Letterman
Image
Bill Murray is on the show tonight. Next week I'll be Goggling 'foods that improve prostate health.'
David Letterman
Image
Stocks are at an all-time high today. I don't have any money in the stock market. I don't have the stomach for the ups and downs. So about 20 years ago I put all of my money and liquid assets into videotape rewind machines.
David Letterman
Image
The Pope also said that while he's in town he would like to go see 'The Book of Mormon.'
David Letterman