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Our guest tonight is Michelle Obama, first lady of the United States. She's here to announce her run for president.

David Letterman

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David Letterman
Age: 77
Born: 1947
Born: April 12
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Indianapolis
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David Michael Letterman
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Have you been following the big oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico? Or as we call it now, the Dead Sea.
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Everyone has this sense of togetherness right now. For example, one guy on the subway today, he wanted to share my pants.
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Iraqi's minister of information did not show up for his press conference today. However, he claims he was there and he said it went very well.
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Al Gore has endorsed Howard Dean for president. That's pretty fitting, the guy that didn't beat Bush endorsing the guy who won't beat Bush.
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Ted Kennedy is endorsing John Kerry and I'm wondering, do you really want the endorsement of a guy with a Bloody Mary mustache?
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I went through one period when I smoked a surprising, a really breath-taking, amount of grass almost every night.
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President Obama has two years left as president. I wouldn't be surprised if he gets to appoint two new Kardashian husbands.
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I got a call from my mom today, she says, 'Well, David, I see you didn't get the 'Tonight Show' again.'
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President Bush wants to build a space station on the moon. And from the moon, he wants to launch people to Mars. You know what this means. He's been drinking again.
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Over the weekend, of course, down there in Washington, D.C., they had the big White House Correspondents' Dinner. Do you know who was really funny? President Obama. So funny, in fact, he has already been promised 'The Tonight Show' in five years.
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Let's see what's going on over in Iraq. A Burger King has opened up and prostitutes are back on the street of Baghdad after 20 years. Fast food and hookers - they are truly living the American Dream.
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If I can be serious now, and I have the feeling I can.
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Donald Trump has a great campaign slogan: 'A complex world demands complex hair.'
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