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Back when we started this show, the hottest program on television was 'Keeping Up With the Gabors.'
David Letterman
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David Letterman
Age: 77
Born: 1947
Born: April 12
Actor
Comedian
Journalist
Talk Show Host
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Weather Presenter
Writer
Indianapolis
Indiana
David Michael Letterman
Earl Hofert
Keeping
Program
Started
Television
Show
Shows
Back
Hottest
More quotes by David Letterman
Some good news. Finally, President Bush is going to do something about global warming. He became alarmed when another chunk of ice fell off his mother.
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Everyone has this sense of togetherness right now. For example, one guy on the subway today, he wanted to share my pants.
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President Obama and his family are spending the holidays in Hawaii, and while they're gone, they got a fence jumper to house sit. Tomorrow, he will be in Hawaii playing golf with Raul Castro and the Pope.
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The post office is raising the price of stamps again. I heard that and said to myself, 'If only there was an inexpensive electronic way of communicating.'
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Political pundits are saying President George W. Bush has made gains in two key states: dazed and confused.
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I cannot sing, dance or act what else would I be but a talk show host.
David Letterman
Today Mitt Romney is 68 years old. It's kind of sad, a 68-year-old guy with no job, no future - wait a minute, that's me.
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Yesterday, the Senate voted to approve President Clinton's decision to send troops to Bosnia. And they voted to change the name of that mission to Operation Forget About Whitewater.
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Mitt Romney said he's not concerned about the very poor. What he means is people making less than a million.
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There's not a man, woman or child on the face of the earth who doesn't enjoy a tasty beverage.
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It's tax season. When I woke this morning and realized it was tax season, I said, My God, didn't we just pay taxes last year?
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Yesterday was Chinese New Year. It's the Year of the Rabbit. And here's how dumb I am. I'm still writing the Year of the Pig on my checks.
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It is cold down in Washington, DC. They had to use an ice scraper on John Boehner's face to get the tears off, it was so cold.
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Mitt Romney and his family have a big two-day weekend plan. They're going to hike to the top of his money.
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Rick Perry, started out like a ball of fire from Texas and then he started to drop and now he's retooling. He's adding advisers to his campaign team. This guy had advisers? Really?
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Someone did a study of the three most-often-heard phrases in New York City. One is Hey taxi. Two is What train do I take to get to Bloomingdales? And three is Don't worry, it's only a flesh wound.
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If I can be serious now, and I have the feeling I can.
David Letterman
Have you been following the big oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico? Or as we call it now, the Dead Sea.
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There's some kind of a thing where when she was Secretary of State she was using her own e-mail instead of the State Department, and I thought finally, a Clinton scandal the entire family can enjoy.
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Because Utah is largely Mormon country, the firing squad's a little different. You're blindfolded but no cigarette.
David Letterman