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Nothing, believe me, nothing is more satisfying to me personally than getting a great idea and then beatin' it to death.

David Letterman

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David Letterman
Age: 77
Born: 1947
Born: April 12
Actor
Comedian
Journalist
Talk Show Host
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Weather Presenter
Writer
Indianapolis
Indiana
David Michael Letterman
Earl Hofert
Getting
Idea
Death
Ideas
Nothing
Great
Beatin
Believe
Satisfying
Personally

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Have you been following the big oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico? Or as we call it now, the Dead Sea.
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When we started the show, there were mixed responses. Half of the people said, 'That show doesn't have a chance.' The other half said, 'That show doesn't have a prayer.'
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Airport screeners are now scanning holiday fruitcakes. Not even the scanners can tell what those little red things are.
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There is so much oil now in the Gulf of Mexico, and you can thank the folks of British Petroleum for this, so much oil in the Gulf, you can now park on it.
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Every day is President's Day when you have an intern!
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Illinois is the only state where the present governor rides around in a car whose license plate was made by a previous governor.
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Here's why Sarah Palin says she won't be running for president. She says she can be more effective at getting others elected by not running. And I thought, well, that's true, because in 2008 she got Obama elected.
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Newt Gingrich is against same-sex marriage. Well, actually, he's against same-marriage sex.
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Why we are here: To tremble at the terrible beauty of the stars, to shed a tear at the perfection of Beethoven's symphonies, and to crack a cold one now and then.
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God forbid I should be the last one to criticize, but I think may be Howard Dean has a bit of a problem because earlier today during a debate in New Hampshire, he bit off Joe Lieberman's ear.
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Every year when it's Chinese New Year here in New York, there are fireworks going off at all hours. New York mothers calm their frightened children by telling them it's just gunfire.
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North Korean dictator Kim Jung Il may be stepping down. Yeah, experts in the State Department say he could be replaced by his son, Menta Li Ill.
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Here's the plot of 'Interstellar.' Refugees - they're known as Democrats - they're looking for a new planet.
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Newt Gingrich wants to build a colony on the Moon. OK, you say, but why? Well, he wants to be the first American to get divorced on the Moon.
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During the debate, Palin winked, wrinkled her nose, and gave a shout-out to a third-grade class. Well, you know, that says commander-in-chief to me right there. You betcha!
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