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Nothing, believe me, nothing is more satisfying to me personally than getting a great idea and then beatin' it to death.

David Letterman

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David Letterman
Age: 77
Born: 1947
Born: April 12
Actor
Comedian
Journalist
Talk Show Host
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Weather Presenter
Writer
Indianapolis
Indiana
David Michael Letterman
Earl Hofert
Personally
Getting
Idea
Death
Ideas
Nothing
Great
Beatin
Believe
Satisfying

More quotes by David Letterman

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Mayor de Blasio has legalized ferrets. Now you can legally own ferrets in New York City. I want to tell you something. If I want to see anymore beady-eyed little weasels, I'll just keep riding the subway.
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I think the number one public-relations blunder Osama has made is that he lives in a cave-fortress and if there's one thing we've learned from it's that you can't trust a guy who lives in a cave-fortress -- Lex Luther, Captain Nemo, Dr. Evil. I'm telling you the list goes on.
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A guy in Pennsylvania was arrested because he was drunk in his golf cart going from bar to bar. So they arrested him. I said: Wait a minute. Isn't that golf?
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Texas Senator Ted Cruz announced he is running for president. Ted Cruz was born in Canada, his father fled to the United States from Cuba, and yet Ted Cruz is against immigration. Isn't that odd?
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Now in Utah if you get the death sentence, they have the firing squad. In Russia, they call that early retirement.
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I believe I have voted for both Democrats and Republicans. Am I either one? Absolutely not. Ladies and gentlemen, I am an American.
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Have you seen a copy of Tax Tips for Billionaires?
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Donald Trump is talking about running for president. He hasn't made an announcement, but I want to tell you something. The fake suspense is killing me.
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Newt Gingrich's campaign is broke. All the money gone. So now he's charging $50 for a photo. And for $100 you can marry him.
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Here's why Sarah Palin says she won't be running for president. She says she can be more effective at getting others elected by not running. And I thought, well, that's true, because in 2008 she got Obama elected.
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Iraq's elite Republican Guard is doing so badly they're changing their name to the Democratic Guard.
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President Obama has two years left as president. I wouldn't be surprised if he gets to appoint two new Kardashian husbands.
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President Obama, by the way, is, I think, making his first presidential European trip. And while he's there in Europe, he plans to fire the CEO's of BMW and Volkswagen.
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I'm an environmentalist. Most of my jokes are recycled.
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The 4th of July combines the two things Americans love most in one day: alcohol and explosives.
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Keep in mind that your individual vote doesn't mean anything.
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New York is great though. If you?re here and want a one of a kind souvenir be sure to take home the police sketch of your assailant.
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One day you're the leader of Iraq, the next day you're being checked for fleas on Fox News.
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New York now leads the world's great cities in the number of people around whom you shouldn't make a sudden move.
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Mitt Romney is not going to be running for president. So you know what that means. We are getting closer and closer to 'President Trump.'
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