Quote

Closing down in the midst of pain is a denial of a man's true nature. A superior man is free in feeling and action, even amidst great pain and hurt. If necessary, a man should live with a hurting heart rather than a closed one. He should learn to stay in the wound of pain and act with spontaneous skill and love even from that place.

David Deida

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David Deida
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: March 18
Author
Non-Fiction Writer
Cleveland
Ohio
Men
Feelings
Stay
Denial
Love
True
Hurt
Closed
Nature
Feeling
Superiors
Amidst
Place
Rather
Skill
Hurting
Live
Free
Midst
Wound
Great
Learn
Wounds
Closing
Even
Pain
Skills
Spontaneous
Heart
Action
Necessary
Superior

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Very few of us trust our immediate connection with nature, or the intuitive intelligence of our body. All too easily, we align ourselves with the logical world of Masculine intelligence. As a culture, we have become so Masculine that we are much more comfortable with analytical problem-solving than with ecstatic dancing!
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Chronic dissatisfaction is how you sense that you are living a lie.
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Your close men friends should be willing to challenge your mediocrity by suggesting a concrete action you can perform that will pop you out of your rut, one way or the other. And you must be willing to offer them your brutal honesty, in the same way, if you are all to grow.
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The way a man penetrates the world should be the same way he penetrates his woman: not merely for personal gain or pleasure, but to magnify love, openness, and depth.
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Your suffering is shaped exactly by your refusal to open.
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One misunderstandin g is that if you do the right thing, then life's storms will stop. If you do the right thing, the storms actually get bigger. This is because they know they can't blow you down like they used to, and now it's going to take a lot more energy to find out if you are conscious.
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You can ravish your woman so deeply that her surrender breaks your heart into light.
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Men who have lived significant lives are men who never waited: not for money, security, ease, or women. Feel what you want to give most as a gift, to your woman and to the world, and do what you can to give it today. Every moment waited is a moment wasted, and each wasted moment degrades your clarity of purpose.
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But if we are truly happy inside, then age brings with it a maturity, a depth, and a power that only magnifies our radiance.
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Whereas women are most turned on by a man's depth of presence, men are most turned on by a woman's radiance and energy: how she moves, moans, smiles, and opens in love.
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Your only real choices are to open fully and receive their gifts or crucify them and be relieved of their force...But you must be willing to feel your heart's terrors and wounds or else you will close and protect yourself, striking back at the source of openness you most yearn to become.
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If you are waiting for anything in order to live and love without holding back, then you suffer.
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As a body in a world, here is our choice: we can be more loving or less loving. That's it. We can relax as the entire moment's show of love's swirl, feeling open as all--a vicious rainstorm, tweeting birds, our lover's lips, a sense of worthlessness-- or we can close to some aspect of experience, pulling away as if we were separate.
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We must see that we are afraid of the thing we most desire, and so we live a mediocre life, never bringing to consummation the primary impulse of our heart.
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Praise is literal food for feminine qualities. If you want your woman to grow in her radiance health, happiness, love, beauty, power and depth, praise these qualities. Praise them daily. A number of times.
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Every man knows that his highest purpose in life cannot be reduced to any particular relationship. If a man prioritizes his relationship over his highest purpose, he weakens himself, disserves the universe, and cheats his woman of an authentic man who can offer his full, undivided presence.
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We're here to learn how to worship consciousness and radiance, evoke it in each other, and tolerate nothing less than our deepest love.
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A fearful man who knows he is fearful is far more trustable than a fearful man who isn’t aware of his fear.
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...you have the opportunity to free fall in this moment between birth and death, right through the hole of your fear, into the unthreatenable openess which is the source of your gifts. The superior man lives as this spontaneous sacrifice of love.
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The feminine in each of us longs for deeper love and tries to find it in intimate relationship, family, or friends.
David Deida