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The best way to confront your fears it to stop avoiding the situation you're most afraid of.

David D. Burns

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David D. Burns
Age: 82
Born: 1942
Born: September 19
Author
Psychiatrist
Fears
Afraid
Stop
Situation
Best
Way
Confront
Avoiding

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Cognitive therapy is based on the idea that when you change the way you think, you can change the way you feel and behave. In other words, if we can learn to think about other people in a more positive and realistic way, it will be far easier to resolve conflicts and develop rewarding personal and professional relationships.
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Apologies do make a difference. Believe it or not, research shows people often prefer them over money.
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What sentence will you choose to impose on yourself? Are you willing to stop suffering and making yourself miserable when your sentence has expired? This would at least be a responsible way to punish yourself because it would be time-limited.
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Kindness is the cause of all anxiety.
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Forgive yourself and be ready to forgive yourself in the future. You're gonna screw up. It's okay.
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Reaching for the stars, perfectionists may end up clutching at air.
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It can be helpful simply to make a written or mental list of the things you do each day. Then give yourself a mental credit for each of them, however small. This will help you focus on what you have done instead of what you haven't gotten around to do. It may sound simplistic, but it works.
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Forgiving yourself, not guilt, increases personal accountability.
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When we're rational about rule-breaking we set a limit. You don't get 30 years in prison for a traffic ticket. But sometimes you sentence yourself to months or years of emotional pain over minor offenses.
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Accept yourself. But realize your behaviors can be bad.
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Can you predict the future with absolute certainty? Your answer must be no. You have two options: You can either decide to accept yourself as an imperfect human being with limited knowledge and realize that you will at times make mistakes, or you can hate yourself for it.
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When two people respect each other, the ability to be vulnerable and to reveal hurt feelings can create a powerful emotional connection that is the source of real intimacy and friendship.
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Perfectionism becomes a badge of honor with you playing the part of the suffering hero.
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Negative thinking patterns can be immensely deceptive and persuasive, and change is rarely easy. But with patience and persistence, I believe that nearly all individuals suffering from depression can improve and experience a sense of joy and self-esteem once again.
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You're not a bad person. But you sometimes do bad things. You know what that makes you? Human.
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Guilt doesn't help. What should fill in for it? Remorse. Remorse is when you feel bad about what you did. Guilt is when you feel bad about who you are.
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Confronting your fears and allowing yourself the right to be human can, paradoxically, make you a far happier and more productive person.
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Reaching for the stars, perfectionists may end up clutching air. They suffer from mood disorders, troubled relationships, and stress. They may even achieve less than others.
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Practically everybody knows what its like to feel anxious, worried, nervous, afraid, uptight, or panicky. Often, anxiety is just a nuisance, but sometimes it can cripple you and prevent you from doing what you really want with your life. But I have some great news for you: You can change the way you feel.
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Every time you feel depressed about something, try to identify a corresponding negative thought you had just prior to and during the depression. Because these thoughts have actually created your bad mood, by learning to restructure them, you can change your mood.
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