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Forgiving yourself, not guilt, increases personal accountability.
David D. Burns
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David D. Burns
Age: 82
Born: 1942
Born: September 19
Author
Psychiatrist
Personal
Increases
Accountability
Forgiving
Guilt
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More quotes by David D. Burns
Depression has been called the worlds number one public health problem. In fact, depression is so widespread it is considered the common cold of psychiatric disturbances. But there is a grim difference between depression and a cold. Depression can kill you.
David D. Burns
The best way to confront your fears it to stop avoiding the situation you're most afraid of.
David D. Burns
You don't have to do anything especially worthy to create or deserve self-esteem all you have to do is turn off that critical, haranguing, inner voice.
David D. Burns
When two people respect each other, the ability to be vulnerable and to reveal hurt feelings can create a powerful emotional connection that is the source of real intimacy and friendship.
David D. Burns
What sentence will you choose to impose on yourself? Are you willing to stop suffering and making yourself miserable when your sentence has expired? This would at least be a responsible way to punish yourself because it would be time-limited.
David D. Burns
Every time you feel depressed about something, try to identify a corresponding negative thought you had just prior to and during the depression. Because these thoughts have actually created your bad mood, by learning to restructure them, you can change your mood.
David D. Burns
Guilt doesn't help. What should fill in for it? Remorse. Remorse is when you feel bad about what you did. Guilt is when you feel bad about who you are.
David D. Burns
Assert your right to make a few mistakes. If people can't accept your imperfections, that's their fault.
David D. Burns
Kindness is the cause of all anxiety.
David D. Burns
Forgive yourself and be ready to forgive yourself in the future. You're gonna screw up. It's okay.
David D. Burns
Practically everybody knows what its like to feel anxious, worried, nervous, afraid, uptight, or panicky. Often, anxiety is just a nuisance, but sometimes it can cripple you and prevent you from doing what you really want with your life. But I have some great news for you: You can change the way you feel.
David D. Burns
Perfectionism becomes a badge of honor with you playing the part of the suffering hero.
David D. Burns
Perfection' is man's ultimate illusion. It simply doesn't exist in the universe.... If you are a perfectionist, you are guaranteed to be a loser in whatever you do.
David D. Burns
When we're rational about rule-breaking we set a limit. You don't get 30 years in prison for a traffic ticket. But sometimes you sentence yourself to months or years of emotional pain over minor offenses.
David D. Burns
Reaching for the stars, perfectionists may end up clutching at air.
David D. Burns
It can be helpful simply to make a written or mental list of the things you do each day. Then give yourself a mental credit for each of them, however small. This will help you focus on what you have done instead of what you haven't gotten around to do. It may sound simplistic, but it works.
David D. Burns
Accept yourself. But realize your behaviors can be bad.
David D. Burns
Reaching for the stars, perfectionists may end up clutching air. They suffer from mood disorders, troubled relationships, and stress. They may even achieve less than others.
David D. Burns
Apologies do make a difference. Believe it or not, research shows people often prefer them over money.
David D. Burns
Cognitive therapy is based on the idea that when you change the way you think, you can change the way you feel and behave. In other words, if we can learn to think about other people in a more positive and realistic way, it will be far easier to resolve conflicts and develop rewarding personal and professional relationships.
David D. Burns
