Quote

When we're rational about rule-breaking we set a limit. You don't get 30 years in prison for a traffic ticket. But sometimes you sentence yourself to months or years of emotional pain over minor offenses.

David D. Burns

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David D. Burns
Age: 82
Born: 1942
Born: September 19
Author
Psychiatrist
Prison
Tickets
Rule
Offense
Limits
Traffic
Emotional
Sentence
Months
Breaking
Offenses
Pain
Limit
Ticket
Sometimes
Sentences
Minor
Years
Rational
Minors

More quotes by David D. Burns

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Every time you feel depressed about something, try to identify a corresponding negative thought you had just prior to and during the depression. Because these thoughts have actually created your bad mood, by learning to restructure them, you can change your mood.
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You don't have to do anything especially worthy to create or deserve self-esteem all you have to do is turn off that critical, haranguing, inner voice.
David D. Burns
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Forgive yourself and be ready to forgive yourself in the future. You're gonna screw up. It's okay.
David D. Burns
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Can you predict the future with absolute certainty? Your answer must be no. You have two options: You can either decide to accept yourself as an imperfect human being with limited knowledge and realize that you will at times make mistakes, or you can hate yourself for it.
David D. Burns
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Forgiving yourself, not guilt, increases personal accountability.
David D. Burns
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You're not a bad person. But you sometimes do bad things. You know what that makes you? Human.
David D. Burns
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What sentence will you choose to impose on yourself? Are you willing to stop suffering and making yourself miserable when your sentence has expired? This would at least be a responsible way to punish yourself because it would be time-limited.
David D. Burns
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Apologies do make a difference. Believe it or not, research shows people often prefer them over money.
David D. Burns
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Don't apologize for what you think you did wrong. Apologize for what they think you did wrong.
David D. Burns
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When two people respect each other, the ability to be vulnerable and to reveal hurt feelings can create a powerful emotional connection that is the source of real intimacy and friendship.
David D. Burns
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Practically everybody knows what its like to feel anxious, worried, nervous, afraid, uptight, or panicky. Often, anxiety is just a nuisance, but sometimes it can cripple you and prevent you from doing what you really want with your life. But I have some great news for you: You can change the way you feel.
David D. Burns
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If you're self-compassionate, you'll tend to have higher self-esteem than if you're endlessly self-critical. And like high self-esteem - self-compassion is associated with significantly less anxiety and depression, as well as more happiness, optimism, and positive emotions.
David D. Burns
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Assert your right to make a few mistakes. If people can't accept your imperfections, that's their fault.
David D. Burns
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Reaching for the stars, perfectionists may end up clutching air. They suffer from mood disorders, troubled relationships, and stress. They may even achieve less than others.
David D. Burns
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Perfectionism becomes a badge of honor with you playing the part of the suffering hero.
David D. Burns
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Cognitive therapy is based on the idea that when you change the way you think, you can change the way you feel and behave. In other words, if we can learn to think about other people in a more positive and realistic way, it will be far easier to resolve conflicts and develop rewarding personal and professional relationships.
David D. Burns
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Guilt doesn't help. What should fill in for it? Remorse. Remorse is when you feel bad about what you did. Guilt is when you feel bad about who you are.
David D. Burns
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Perfection' is man's ultimate illusion. It simply doesn't exist in the universe.... If you are a perfectionist, you are guaranteed to be a loser in whatever you do.
David D. Burns
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The best way to confront your fears it to stop avoiding the situation you're most afraid of.
David D. Burns
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Learn to accept your limits and you'll become a happier person.
David D. Burns