Quote

When we're rational about rule-breaking we set a limit. You don't get 30 years in prison for a traffic ticket. But sometimes you sentence yourself to months or years of emotional pain over minor offenses.

David D. Burns

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David D. Burns
Age: 82
Born: 1942
Born: September 19
Author
Psychiatrist
Limits
Traffic
Emotional
Sentence
Months
Breaking
Offenses
Pain
Limit
Ticket
Sometimes
Sentences
Minor
Years
Rational
Minors
Prison
Tickets
Rule
Offense

More quotes by David D. Burns

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Every time you feel depressed about something, try to identify a corresponding negative thought you had just prior to and during the depression. Because these thoughts have actually created your bad mood, by learning to restructure them, you can change your mood.
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Perfectionism becomes a badge of honor with you playing the part of the suffering hero.
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Cognitive therapy is based on the idea that when you change the way you think, you can change the way you feel and behave. In other words, if we can learn to think about other people in a more positive and realistic way, it will be far easier to resolve conflicts and develop rewarding personal and professional relationships.
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You're not a bad person. But you sometimes do bad things. You know what that makes you? Human.
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Learn to accept your limits and you'll become a happier person.
David D. Burns
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When two people respect each other, the ability to be vulnerable and to reveal hurt feelings can create a powerful emotional connection that is the source of real intimacy and friendship.
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Don't apologize for what you think you did wrong. Apologize for what they think you did wrong.
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Reaching for the stars, perfectionists may end up clutching at air.
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What sentence will you choose to impose on yourself? Are you willing to stop suffering and making yourself miserable when your sentence has expired? This would at least be a responsible way to punish yourself because it would be time-limited.
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Kindness is the cause of all anxiety.
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Accept yourself. But realize your behaviors can be bad.
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It can be helpful simply to make a written or mental list of the things you do each day. Then give yourself a mental credit for each of them, however small. This will help you focus on what you have done instead of what you haven't gotten around to do. It may sound simplistic, but it works.
David D. Burns
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Guilt doesn't help. What should fill in for it? Remorse. Remorse is when you feel bad about what you did. Guilt is when you feel bad about who you are.
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Assert your right to make a few mistakes. If people can't accept your imperfections, that's their fault.
David D. Burns
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The best way to confront your fears it to stop avoiding the situation you're most afraid of.
David D. Burns
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Apologies do make a difference. Believe it or not, research shows people often prefer them over money.
David D. Burns
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Practically everybody knows what its like to feel anxious, worried, nervous, afraid, uptight, or panicky. Often, anxiety is just a nuisance, but sometimes it can cripple you and prevent you from doing what you really want with your life. But I have some great news for you: You can change the way you feel.
David D. Burns
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If you're self-compassionate, you'll tend to have higher self-esteem than if you're endlessly self-critical. And like high self-esteem - self-compassion is associated with significantly less anxiety and depression, as well as more happiness, optimism, and positive emotions.
David D. Burns
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Reaching for the stars, perfectionists may end up clutching air. They suffer from mood disorders, troubled relationships, and stress. They may even achieve less than others.
David D. Burns
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Forgive yourself and be ready to forgive yourself in the future. You're gonna screw up. It's okay.
David D. Burns