Quote

Don't apologize for what you think you did wrong. Apologize for what they think you did wrong.

David D. Burns

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

David D. Burns
Age: 82
Born: 1942
Born: September 19
Author
Psychiatrist
Apologize
Apologizing
Wrong
Think
Thinking

More quotes by David D. Burns

Image
Forgiving yourself, not guilt, increases personal accountability.
David D. Burns
Image
When we're rational about rule-breaking we set a limit. You don't get 30 years in prison for a traffic ticket. But sometimes you sentence yourself to months or years of emotional pain over minor offenses.
David D. Burns
Image
Kindness is the cause of all anxiety.
David D. Burns
Image
Learn to accept your limits and you'll become a happier person.
David D. Burns
Image
You don't have to do anything especially worthy to create or deserve self-esteem all you have to do is turn off that critical, haranguing, inner voice.
David D. Burns
Image
Accept yourself. But realize your behaviors can be bad.
David D. Burns
Image
The best way to confront your fears it to stop avoiding the situation you're most afraid of.
David D. Burns
Image
If you're self-compassionate, you'll tend to have higher self-esteem than if you're endlessly self-critical. And like high self-esteem - self-compassion is associated with significantly less anxiety and depression, as well as more happiness, optimism, and positive emotions.
David D. Burns
Image
When two people respect each other, the ability to be vulnerable and to reveal hurt feelings can create a powerful emotional connection that is the source of real intimacy and friendship.
David D. Burns
Image
Reaching for the stars, perfectionists may end up clutching air. They suffer from mood disorders, troubled relationships, and stress. They may even achieve less than others.
David D. Burns
Image
Perfection' is man's ultimate illusion. It simply doesn't exist in the universe.... If you are a perfectionist, you are guaranteed to be a loser in whatever you do.
David D. Burns
Image
Forgive yourself and be ready to forgive yourself in the future. You're gonna screw up. It's okay.
David D. Burns
Image
You're not a bad person. But you sometimes do bad things. You know what that makes you? Human.
David D. Burns
Image
What sentence will you choose to impose on yourself? Are you willing to stop suffering and making yourself miserable when your sentence has expired? This would at least be a responsible way to punish yourself because it would be time-limited.
David D. Burns
Image
Guilt doesn't help. What should fill in for it? Remorse. Remorse is when you feel bad about what you did. Guilt is when you feel bad about who you are.
David D. Burns
Image
Assert your right to make a few mistakes. If people can't accept your imperfections, that's their fault.
David D. Burns
Image
Perfectionism becomes a badge of honor with you playing the part of the suffering hero.
David D. Burns
Image
Every time you feel depressed about something, try to identify a corresponding negative thought you had just prior to and during the depression. Because these thoughts have actually created your bad mood, by learning to restructure them, you can change your mood.
David D. Burns
Image
Apologies do make a difference. Believe it or not, research shows people often prefer them over money.
David D. Burns
Image
It can be helpful simply to make a written or mental list of the things you do each day. Then give yourself a mental credit for each of them, however small. This will help you focus on what you have done instead of what you haven't gotten around to do. It may sound simplistic, but it works.
David D. Burns