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Apologies do make a difference. Believe it or not, research shows people often prefer them over money.

David D. Burns

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David D. Burns
Age: 82
Born: 1942
Born: September 19
Author
Psychiatrist
Money
Apologies
Believe
Apology
Make
Prefer
People
Research
Difference
Differences
Often
Shows

More quotes by David D. Burns

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Kindness is the cause of all anxiety.
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Learn to accept your limits and you'll become a happier person.
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Don't apologize for what you think you did wrong. Apologize for what they think you did wrong.
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Depression has been called the worlds number one public health problem. In fact, depression is so widespread it is considered the common cold of psychiatric disturbances. But there is a grim difference between depression and a cold. Depression can kill you.
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The best way to confront your fears it to stop avoiding the situation you're most afraid of.
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Perfection' is man's ultimate illusion. It simply doesn't exist in the universe.... If you are a perfectionist, you are guaranteed to be a loser in whatever you do.
David D. Burns
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Every time you feel depressed about something, try to identify a corresponding negative thought you had just prior to and during the depression. Because these thoughts have actually created your bad mood, by learning to restructure them, you can change your mood.
David D. Burns
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Guilt doesn't help. What should fill in for it? Remorse. Remorse is when you feel bad about what you did. Guilt is when you feel bad about who you are.
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Confronting your fears and allowing yourself the right to be human can, paradoxically, make you a far happier and more productive person.
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Can you predict the future with absolute certainty? Your answer must be no. You have two options: You can either decide to accept yourself as an imperfect human being with limited knowledge and realize that you will at times make mistakes, or you can hate yourself for it.
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It can be helpful simply to make a written or mental list of the things you do each day. Then give yourself a mental credit for each of them, however small. This will help you focus on what you have done instead of what you haven't gotten around to do. It may sound simplistic, but it works.
David D. Burns
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Negative thinking patterns can be immensely deceptive and persuasive, and change is rarely easy. But with patience and persistence, I believe that nearly all individuals suffering from depression can improve and experience a sense of joy and self-esteem once again.
David D. Burns
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Perfectionism becomes a badge of honor with you playing the part of the suffering hero.
David D. Burns
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If you're self-compassionate, you'll tend to have higher self-esteem than if you're endlessly self-critical. And like high self-esteem - self-compassion is associated with significantly less anxiety and depression, as well as more happiness, optimism, and positive emotions.
David D. Burns
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Forgive yourself and be ready to forgive yourself in the future. You're gonna screw up. It's okay.
David D. Burns
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You don't have to do anything especially worthy to create or deserve self-esteem all you have to do is turn off that critical, haranguing, inner voice.
David D. Burns
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When we're rational about rule-breaking we set a limit. You don't get 30 years in prison for a traffic ticket. But sometimes you sentence yourself to months or years of emotional pain over minor offenses.
David D. Burns
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Cognitive therapy is based on the idea that when you change the way you think, you can change the way you feel and behave. In other words, if we can learn to think about other people in a more positive and realistic way, it will be far easier to resolve conflicts and develop rewarding personal and professional relationships.
David D. Burns
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Accept yourself. But realize your behaviors can be bad.
David D. Burns
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Reaching for the stars, perfectionists may end up clutching air. They suffer from mood disorders, troubled relationships, and stress. They may even achieve less than others.
David D. Burns