Quote

Guilt doesn't help. What should fill in for it? Remorse. Remorse is when you feel bad about what you did. Guilt is when you feel bad about who you are.

David D. Burns

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David D. Burns
Age: 82
Born: 1942
Born: September 19
Author
Psychiatrist
Feels
Remorse
Fill
Guilt
Help
Helping
Doesn
Feel

More quotes by David D. Burns

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Can you predict the future with absolute certainty? Your answer must be no. You have two options: You can either decide to accept yourself as an imperfect human being with limited knowledge and realize that you will at times make mistakes, or you can hate yourself for it.
David D. Burns
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The best way to confront your fears it to stop avoiding the situation you're most afraid of.
David D. Burns
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Perfection' is man's ultimate illusion. It simply doesn't exist in the universe.... If you are a perfectionist, you are guaranteed to be a loser in whatever you do.
David D. Burns
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Learn to accept your limits and you'll become a happier person.
David D. Burns
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You're not a bad person. But you sometimes do bad things. You know what that makes you? Human.
David D. Burns
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Don't apologize for what you think you did wrong. Apologize for what they think you did wrong.
David D. Burns
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Forgiving yourself, not guilt, increases personal accountability.
David D. Burns
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What sentence will you choose to impose on yourself? Are you willing to stop suffering and making yourself miserable when your sentence has expired? This would at least be a responsible way to punish yourself because it would be time-limited.
David D. Burns
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When we're rational about rule-breaking we set a limit. You don't get 30 years in prison for a traffic ticket. But sometimes you sentence yourself to months or years of emotional pain over minor offenses.
David D. Burns
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Kindness is the cause of all anxiety.
David D. Burns
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When two people respect each other, the ability to be vulnerable and to reveal hurt feelings can create a powerful emotional connection that is the source of real intimacy and friendship.
David D. Burns
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Reaching for the stars, perfectionists may end up clutching air. They suffer from mood disorders, troubled relationships, and stress. They may even achieve less than others.
David D. Burns
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If you're self-compassionate, you'll tend to have higher self-esteem than if you're endlessly self-critical. And like high self-esteem - self-compassion is associated with significantly less anxiety and depression, as well as more happiness, optimism, and positive emotions.
David D. Burns
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You don't have to do anything especially worthy to create or deserve self-esteem all you have to do is turn off that critical, haranguing, inner voice.
David D. Burns
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Perfectionism becomes a badge of honor with you playing the part of the suffering hero.
David D. Burns
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Accept yourself. But realize your behaviors can be bad.
David D. Burns
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Assert your right to make a few mistakes. If people can't accept your imperfections, that's their fault.
David D. Burns
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Forgive yourself and be ready to forgive yourself in the future. You're gonna screw up. It's okay.
David D. Burns
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Negative thinking patterns can be immensely deceptive and persuasive, and change is rarely easy. But with patience and persistence, I believe that nearly all individuals suffering from depression can improve and experience a sense of joy and self-esteem once again.
David D. Burns
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Apologies do make a difference. Believe it or not, research shows people often prefer them over money.
David D. Burns