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When two people respect each other, the ability to be vulnerable and to reveal hurt feelings can create a powerful emotional connection that is the source of real intimacy and friendship.
David D. Burns
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David D. Burns
Age: 82
Born: 1942
Born: September 19
Author
Psychiatrist
Real
Source
Vulnerability
People
Respect
Reveal
Create
Intimacy
Hurt
Connection
Powerful
Vulnerable
Ability
Connections
Feelings
Friendship
Two
Emotional
More quotes by David D. Burns
Perfection' is man's ultimate illusion. It simply doesn't exist in the universe.... If you are a perfectionist, you are guaranteed to be a loser in whatever you do.
David D. Burns
Practically everybody knows what its like to feel anxious, worried, nervous, afraid, uptight, or panicky. Often, anxiety is just a nuisance, but sometimes it can cripple you and prevent you from doing what you really want with your life. But I have some great news for you: You can change the way you feel.
David D. Burns
Guilt doesn't help. What should fill in for it? Remorse. Remorse is when you feel bad about what you did. Guilt is when you feel bad about who you are.
David D. Burns
Every time you feel depressed about something, try to identify a corresponding negative thought you had just prior to and during the depression. Because these thoughts have actually created your bad mood, by learning to restructure them, you can change your mood.
David D. Burns
Perfectionism becomes a badge of honor with you playing the part of the suffering hero.
David D. Burns
When we're rational about rule-breaking we set a limit. You don't get 30 years in prison for a traffic ticket. But sometimes you sentence yourself to months or years of emotional pain over minor offenses.
David D. Burns
Negative thinking patterns can be immensely deceptive and persuasive, and change is rarely easy. But with patience and persistence, I believe that nearly all individuals suffering from depression can improve and experience a sense of joy and self-esteem once again.
David D. Burns
Can you predict the future with absolute certainty? Your answer must be no. You have two options: You can either decide to accept yourself as an imperfect human being with limited knowledge and realize that you will at times make mistakes, or you can hate yourself for it.
David D. Burns
Learn to accept your limits and you'll become a happier person.
David D. Burns
The best way to confront your fears it to stop avoiding the situation you're most afraid of.
David D. Burns
Assert your right to make a few mistakes. If people can't accept your imperfections, that's their fault.
David D. Burns
Forgive yourself and be ready to forgive yourself in the future. You're gonna screw up. It's okay.
David D. Burns
Forgiving yourself, not guilt, increases personal accountability.
David D. Burns
Apologies do make a difference. Believe it or not, research shows people often prefer them over money.
David D. Burns
It can be helpful simply to make a written or mental list of the things you do each day. Then give yourself a mental credit for each of them, however small. This will help you focus on what you have done instead of what you haven't gotten around to do. It may sound simplistic, but it works.
David D. Burns
Reaching for the stars, perfectionists may end up clutching at air.
David D. Burns
Kindness is the cause of all anxiety.
David D. Burns
Cognitive therapy is based on the idea that when you change the way you think, you can change the way you feel and behave. In other words, if we can learn to think about other people in a more positive and realistic way, it will be far easier to resolve conflicts and develop rewarding personal and professional relationships.
David D. Burns
Accept yourself. But realize your behaviors can be bad.
David D. Burns
Reaching for the stars, perfectionists may end up clutching air. They suffer from mood disorders, troubled relationships, and stress. They may even achieve less than others.
David D. Burns
