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I read the New York Times, and if I'm in a different city, I'll skim that paper.

David Cross

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David Cross
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: April 4
Actor
Comedian
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Screenwriter
Singer
Stage Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Roswell
Georgia
Times
Different
Skim
York
City
Paper
Cities
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More quotes by David Cross

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My biggest problem is retaining the exact information.
David Cross
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[On the Dating Handbook] 'With a telescope, some munchies, and a warm blanket, watch for Halley's comet.' Yeah. I like that. There's no time limit. Just sit there and grow old together.
David Cross
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I really don't have a problem with gay marriage... because I'm tolerant and rational.
David Cross
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I don't want to do 20 minutes on Donald Trump. I want to do 10 minutes and move on. I wouldn't even do that with a live show, because I don't want it to feel like An Evening Of Political Comedy.
David Cross
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I was born Jewish, but I am an atheist. I dont believe in God.
David Cross
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I'm very vocal about my belief that all religion is garbage. Most of my friends are religious or at least spiritual. These are people I like and I know are intelligent. It's this thing that I carry around. I know I'd be a better person if I was fairer, but it's at the core of who I am and what I believe.
David Cross
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There are really funny alternative comics and really funny straight comics who write and perform traditionally.
David Cross
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I do lots of other drugs but I smoke pot maybe 5-10 times a year now. I used to smoke it all the time, but I don't, and I haven't for awhile. That's just because it makes me - and I'm not saying this about everybody else - but it makes me kind of dumb and self-conscious.
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I just did 101 shows in 86 different cities in America and Europe and Canada, and I'm not lying or exaggerating when I say, at the vast majority of shows, they loved it. There were encores, there were standing ovations.
David Cross
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I'm finally going to be able to finally criticize [Hillary Clinton] without being accused of being a sexist - that idea. I'm not a fan, I don't like her, but you can't say anything without being accused of being a sexist pig, which is unfair.
David Cross
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I am truly passionate and concerned about the lack of empathy that people show towards one another.
David Cross
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I also try to think of ways to articulate the joke more economically.
David Cross
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I've never written jokes. I mean, I'll write things on a piece of paper and riff on them onstage.
David Cross
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I'm concerned about how and why there is no gun control.
David Cross
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We get to see it! January 1st, 2000! We get to see... all those fundamentalist preachers having to do their backpedaling when the Armageddon doesn't occur.
David Cross
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I know Dave [Attel] and we're friendly, and I have nothing but respect for him.
David Cross
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I think pornography is the only art form where you can be videotaped on a shaky handy cam sucking off a horse and be considered a star.
David Cross
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The underpinning of immigration concerns is xenophobia and racism and nationalism.
David Cross
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Because you've been on dates where y'know, you forget to open your eyes and wear pants and speak English.
David Cross
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The Bible is the funniest book I have ever read. It's so funny! Right in the first six pages, it's funny!
David Cross