Quote

I have a few business ideas (that I'm going to advertise in High Times, amongst other places), and one of them is a service in which I offer to eat and describe pork to kosher people.

David Cross

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

David Cross
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: April 4
Actor
Comedian
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Screenwriter
Singer
Stage Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Roswell
Georgia
Times
Amongst
Funny
Describe
Business
Offer
Ideas
Service
Going
Offers
People
Places
Kosher
Humor
Advertise
High
Pork

More quotes by David Cross

Image
The underpinning of immigration concerns is xenophobia and racism and nationalism.
David Cross
Image
I'm concerned about organized religion getting away with what it gets away with.
David Cross
Image
I do lots of other drugs but I smoke pot maybe 5-10 times a year now. I used to smoke it all the time, but I don't, and I haven't for awhile. That's just because it makes me - and I'm not saying this about everybody else - but it makes me kind of dumb and self-conscious.
David Cross
Image
You can't just yell jokes at people.
David Cross
Image
There were a number of referendums in '98 that most of the things I voted for passed. That's very satisfying when you feel that most of the country is in step with your views.
David Cross
Image
The best thing about me is there are no skeletons.
David Cross
Image
Because you've been on dates where y'know, you forget to open your eyes and wear pants and speak English.
David Cross
Image
Ive got a lot of friends there and there is stuff to do but as much as I dislike LA I really like living and working in New York City.
David Cross
Image
I've had plenty of negative reviews. I have my entire life.
David Cross
Image
I just did 101 shows in 86 different cities in America and Europe and Canada, and I'm not lying or exaggerating when I say, at the vast majority of shows, they loved it. There were encores, there were standing ovations.
David Cross
Image
I'd be curious to find out, but I don't think people in the entertainment industry are proportionally more or less serious politically than anyone in the landscaping industry.
David Cross
Image
We get to see it! January 1st, 2000! We get to see... all those fundamentalist preachers having to do their backpedaling when the Armageddon doesn't occur.
David Cross
Image
I did one of the worst shows for that kind of thing in Northampton, Massachusetts, which is one of the most liberal spots on the planet. There were numerous people who walked out, somebody had thrown a beer, I had people yelling and screaming.
David Cross
Image
I would say just stop watching me, I guess, at this point. That is what I do, and it probably is, in some way, a bit of a lecture. I can see how that's not something that would be enticing for you to watch in a stand-up hour.
David Cross
Image
Hopefully people are upset for the reason I want them to be upset. Even when I was doing open mics, I've always had people upset. I've never been the consummate crowd-pleaser.
David Cross
Image
In my political philosophy - which is definitely more socialist Democrat than centrist politician like Hillary Clinton - I think regulation for banks and those platforms that Bernie Sanders had are good for the whole of America.
David Cross
Image
I'm directing the Sky show. I'm not going to be in it. I'm just writing and directing it. So that'll satisfy that part of my brain.
David Cross
Image
I am truly passionate and concerned about the lack of empathy that people show towards one another.
David Cross
Image
Nobody is going to be as bad for free thinking, right-minded individuals than George Bush.
David Cross
Image
And it's one more shitty thing to write about somebody, in between getting really, really, really upset at female Ghostbusters and Gamergate, and the things that really matter.
David Cross