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We get to see it! January 1st, 2000! We get to see... all those fundamentalist preachers having to do their backpedaling when the Armageddon doesn't occur.
David Cross
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David Cross
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: April 4
Actor
Comedian
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Screenwriter
Singer
Stage Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Roswell
Georgia
Doesn
Armageddon
Preachers
Fundamentalist
January
Preacher
Occur
Humor
Funny
More quotes by David Cross
I'm not going to benefit from free college education, but I think all those things are good for the country.
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I think for a lot of people, it's just where their saturation point was. Once you get into the [Donald] Trump stuff and the Republican stuff and the Ayn Rand followers, it doesn't let up for about half an hour. It gets hard and stays hard for a while.
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I know Dave [Attel] and we're friendly, and I have nothing but respect for him.
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We should just get somebody from the left and the right and they should all throw bumper stickers at each other and the first one to cover the other one wins.
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I am against the war, but I do support our white troops. No, I'm kidding, I'm kidding. I'm not a Republican. I'm not a member of the party of inclusion. Wonderful, tolerant, rational human beings they are.
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Hopefully people will be reinventing comedy forever and ever. This is just what I do, and it's a type of comedy.
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I've gotten condescending a million times, and that's not good.
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And it's one more shitty thing to write about somebody, in between getting really, really, really upset at female Ghostbusters and Gamergate, and the things that really matter.
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I would say just stop watching me, I guess, at this point. That is what I do, and it probably is, in some way, a bit of a lecture. I can see how that's not something that would be enticing for you to watch in a stand-up hour.
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Because you've been on dates where y'know, you forget to open your eyes and wear pants and speak English.
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I don't think of my opponents in the sense that I don't think of them consciously, I don't steer it one way or the other.
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In my political philosophy - which is definitely more socialist Democrat than centrist politician like Hillary Clinton - I think regulation for banks and those platforms that Bernie Sanders had are good for the whole of America.
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I don't want to do 20 minutes on Donald Trump. I want to do 10 minutes and move on. I wouldn't even do that with a live show, because I don't want it to feel like An Evening Of Political Comedy.
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I've had plenty of negative reviews. I have my entire life.
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There were a handful of shows that were just painful. Not many, but things where I just said going into it, Why am I here? What am I doing?
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Hopefully people are upset for the reason I want them to be upset. Even when I was doing open mics, I've always had people upset. I've never been the consummate crowd-pleaser.
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I'm very vocal about my belief that all religion is garbage. Most of my friends are religious or at least spiritual. These are people I like and I know are intelligent. It's this thing that I carry around. I know I'd be a better person if I was fairer, but it's at the core of who I am and what I believe.
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I love doing stuff with Todd Barry and Jon Benjamin. We give the stage to good bands and funny people.
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The Bible is the funniest book I have ever read. It's so funny! Right in the first six pages, it's funny!
David Cross