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I lived in LA for almost nine years and if I never went back there again it would be fine.

David Cross

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David Cross
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: April 4
Actor
Comedian
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Screenwriter
Singer
Stage Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Roswell
Georgia
Years
Nine
Never
Lived
Would
Humor
Fine
Went
Almost
Funny
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More quotes by David Cross

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I read the New York Times, and if I'm in a different city, I'll skim that paper.
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I am against the war, but I do support our white troops. No, I'm kidding, I'm kidding. I'm not a Republican. I'm not a member of the party of inclusion. Wonderful, tolerant, rational human beings they are.
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I'm not a centrist, and there's nothing about me that's centrist. I never have been.
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I'm very vocal about my belief that all religion is garbage. Most of my friends are religious or at least spiritual. These are people I like and I know are intelligent. It's this thing that I carry around. I know I'd be a better person if I was fairer, but it's at the core of who I am and what I believe.
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I'd say 95 percent of my audience was white. They were mostly kind of older hipster folks like myself.
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Because you've been on dates where y'know, you forget to open your eyes and wear pants and speak English.
David Cross
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High Times magazine is a notch intellectually below Highlights for Children. I mean, they're both great to read when you're baked, but come on, ya know.
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And it's one more shitty thing to write about somebody, in between getting really, really, really upset at female Ghostbusters and Gamergate, and the things that really matter.
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I've had plenty of negative reviews. I have my entire life.
David Cross
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[On the Dating Handbook] 'With a telescope, some munchies, and a warm blanket, watch for Halley's comet.' Yeah. I like that. There's no time limit. Just sit there and grow old together.
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I went to a bunch of marches in New York and Washington, and you know I believe in the cause, but to march with those people takes a lot of compromise on my end.
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I've gotten condescending a million times, and that's not good.
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I'd be curious to find out, but I don't think people in the entertainment industry are proportionally more or less serious politically than anyone in the landscaping industry.
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Nobody is going to be as bad for free thinking, right-minded individuals than George Bush.
David Cross
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I just often find myself getting shrill, angry and the jokes get more incredulous.
David Cross
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If you wanna find out 101 things to do with plums, heh, read your in-flight magazine.
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I did one of the worst shows for that kind of thing in Northampton, Massachusetts, which is one of the most liberal spots on the planet. There were numerous people who walked out, somebody had thrown a beer, I had people yelling and screaming.
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In my political philosophy - which is definitely more socialist Democrat than centrist politician like Hillary Clinton - I think regulation for banks and those platforms that Bernie Sanders had are good for the whole of America.
David Cross
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It probably does make it more difficult to enjoy a good laugh at someone who's onstage, seemingly yelling at you. But I'm not yelling at the audience, I'm yelling at the world. It genuinely sucks if people are taking it that way. But I'm not talking to individuals.
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I'm concerned about how and why there is no gun control.
David Cross