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You cannot win a War on Terrorism. It's like having a war on jealousy.

David Cross

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David Cross
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: April 4
Actor
Comedian
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Screenwriter
Singer
Stage Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Roswell
Georgia
Terrorism
Winning
Peace
War
Cannot
Like
Antiwar
Jealousy

More quotes by David Cross

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[On the Dating Handbook] 'With a telescope, some munchies, and a warm blanket, watch for Halley's comet.' Yeah. I like that. There's no time limit. Just sit there and grow old together.
David Cross
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I have a few business ideas (that I'm going to advertise in High Times, amongst other places), and one of them is a service in which I offer to eat and describe pork to kosher people.
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I really don't have a problem with gay marriage... because I'm tolerant and rational.
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The Bible is the funniest book I have ever read. It's so funny! Right in the first six pages, it's funny!
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If you wanna find out 101 things to do with plums, heh, read your in-flight magazine.
David Cross
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And it's one more shitty thing to write about somebody, in between getting really, really, really upset at female Ghostbusters and Gamergate, and the things that really matter.
David Cross
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I just did 101 shows in 86 different cities in America and Europe and Canada, and I'm not lying or exaggerating when I say, at the vast majority of shows, they loved it. There were encores, there were standing ovations.
David Cross
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I'm concerned about organized religion getting away with what it gets away with.
David Cross
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High Times magazine is a notch intellectually below Highlights for Children. I mean, they're both great to read when you're baked, but come on, ya know.
David Cross
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I do lots of other drugs but I smoke pot maybe 5-10 times a year now. I used to smoke it all the time, but I don't, and I haven't for awhile. That's just because it makes me - and I'm not saying this about everybody else - but it makes me kind of dumb and self-conscious.
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I've had plenty of negative reviews. I have my entire life.
David Cross
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The best thing about me is there are no skeletons.
David Cross
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Aqua Teen Hunger Force is one of the funniest shows on TV and I was a little intimidated working with those guys 'cause you're in a sound booth by yourself and they're all in a room in Atlanta.
David Cross
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The South has more of a disproportionate amount of irony on T-shirts than any other region in the country.
David Cross
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I stand by everything I said. I absolutely can defend my material, and I take issue with people who say, It's just shock value. It's not even funny. I disagree. There's different ways to be funny and to be a comedian.
David Cross
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I think pornography is the only art form where you can be videotaped on a shaky handy cam sucking off a horse and be considered a star.
David Cross
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I'm concerned about how and why there is no gun control.
David Cross
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I did one of the worst shows for that kind of thing in Northampton, Massachusetts, which is one of the most liberal spots on the planet. There were numerous people who walked out, somebody had thrown a beer, I had people yelling and screaming.
David Cross
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I work a lot and I like to get out and work but the work I do to make the other work work I'm not very good at.
David Cross
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I hate bumper stickers, you can't sum anything up. All you do is paint yourself in some caricaturist corner.
David Cross