Quote

Ask not what your country can do for you. Ask whether your country has been inhaling paint-thinner fumes.

Dave Barry

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Dave Barry
Age: 77
Born: 1947
Born: July 3
Actor
Author
Columnist
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Satirist
Writer
Armonk (New York)
David McAlister Barry
David Barry
Country
Inhaling
Fumes
Thinner
Paint
Asks
Whether

More quotes by Dave Barry

Image
As a professional journalist, I am always looking for new ways to get paid for being motionless.
Dave Barry
Image
What was life like in the colonies? Probably the best word to describe it would be colonial.
Dave Barry
Image
Famous designers think nothing of putting their names on your clothing, but would have the servants set the dogs on you if you ever tried to put your name on their clothing.
Dave Barry
Image
I was reading this James Bond book, and right away I realized that, like most books, it had too many words.
Dave Barry
Image
I got a lot of mail from organizations concerned with bike safety. Then I got a couple from people who wanted my support for mandatory helmet laws. I can't support that. If you pass a law like that you'll do more harm than good, because you'll make people think they've done something about the problem when they haven't.
Dave Barry
Image
My theory is that there is a finite amount of intelligence in a family, and you're supposed to gradually transfer it to your children over a period of many years. This is why your parents started to get so stupid just at the time in your life when you were getting really smart.
Dave Barry
Image
My therapist told me the way to achieve true inner peace is to finish what I start. So far today, I have finished 2 bags of M&M's and a chocolate cake. I feel better already.
Dave Barry
Image
Recently I began to feel this void in my life, even after meals, and I said to myself, Dave, all you do with your spare time is sit around and drink beer. You need a hobby. So I got a hobby. I make beer.
Dave Barry
Image
The way this country deals with drugs is just not funny. What a waste of everyone's time and effort. What a waste of a lot of people's lives.
Dave Barry
Image
Take out the fortune before you eat the cookie.
Dave Barry
Image
I do not mean to suggest for a moment that all it takes to be a top executive is a custom-tailored European suit. You also need the correct shirt and tie.
Dave Barry
Image
The Internet: transforming society and shaping the future through chat.
Dave Barry
Image
There are two kinds of solar-heat systems: passive systems collect the sunlight that hits your home, and active systems collect the sunlight that hits your neighbors' homes, too.
Dave Barry
Image
If God had wanted us to be concerned for the plight of the toads, he would have made them cute and furry.
Dave Barry
Image
Can we move this conversation along, I'm getting frightfully tired of 'hoa'.
Dave Barry
Image
Talking about golf is always boring. Playing golf can be interesting, but not the part where you try to hit the little ball only the part where you drive the cart.
Dave Barry
Image
There are no bad haircuts in cyberspace.
Dave Barry
Image
Your job is to give people a reason to keep reading.
Dave Barry
Image
We'll try to cooperate fully with the IRS, because, as citizens, we feel a strong patriotic duty not to go to jail.
Dave Barry
Image
I called a company and asked to speak to Bob. The person who answered said, Bob is on vacation. Would you like to hold?
Dave Barry