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I'm a big believer in anesthesia. I think it should be used for every medical procedure, indlucing routine physicals.

Dave Barry

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Dave Barry
Age: 77
Born: 1947
Born: July 3
Actor
Author
Columnist
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Satirist
Writer
Armonk (New York)
David McAlister Barry
David Barry
Think
Procedure
Thinking
Procedures
Routine
Believer
Medical
Bigs
Used
Every
Anesthesia

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When I say dogs, I'm talking about dogs, which are large, bounding, salivating animals, usually with bad breath. I am not talking about those little squeaky things you can hold on your lap and carry around. Zoologically speaking, these are not dogs at all they are members of the pillow family.
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Your guess is as good as mine. Better probably, because you haven't had four beers.
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The word aerobics comes from two Greek words: aero, meaning “ability to,” and bics, meaning “withstand tremendous boredom.
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What I need is a search engine that, no matter what I type in, comes back with GO BACK TO WORK.
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The world is full of strange phenomena that cannot be explained by the laws of logic or science. Dennis Rodman is only one example.
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I tried sniffing Coke once, but the ice cubes got stuck in my nose.
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The books all say that barracuda rarely eat people, but very few barracuda can read.
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Bill Gates is a very rich man today... and do you want to know why? The answer is one word: versions.
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In the Bowling Alley of Tomorrow, there will even be machines that wear rental shoes and throw the ball for you. Your sole function will be to drink beer.
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The Sixties are now considered a historical period, just like the Roman Empire.
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I will vote for the first candidate who promises to use nuclear missiles against LinkedIn.
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Every year, hundreds of thousands of people try their hand at this demanding profession (humor columnist). After a few months, almost all of them have given up and gone back to the ninth grade.
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Dear Hotel People: We don't need a cheeseball clock-radio. WE NEED PLACES TO PLUG STUFF IN. Thank you.
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I have never had a point in my life to make. I'm just trying to entertain the reader.
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If you look at any list of great modern writers such as Ernest Hemingway, William Faulkner, and F. Scott Fitzgerald, you'll notice two things about them: 1. They all had editors. 2. They are all dead. Thus we can draw the scientific conclusion that editors are fatal.
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I hate rap music, which to me sounds like a bunch of angry men shouting, possibly because the person who was supposed to provide them with a melody never showed up.
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Software: These programs give instruction to the CPU, which processes billions of tiny facts called bytes, and within a fraction of a second it sends you an error message that requires you to call the customer-support hot line and be placed on hold for approximately the life-span of a caribou.
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The old system of having a baby was much better than the new system, the old system being characterized by the fact that the man didn't have to watch.
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As a professional journalist, I am always looking for new ways to get paid for being motionless.
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