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The taxpayers cannot be relied upon to support performing arts such as opera. As a taxpayer, I am forced to admit that I would rather undergo a vasectomy via Weed Whacker than attend an opera.
Dave Barry
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Dave Barry
Age: 77
Born: 1947
Born: July 3
Actor
Author
Columnist
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Satirist
Writer
Armonk (New York)
David McAlister Barry
David Barry
Upon
Weed
Art
Opera
Cannot
Forced
Vasectomy
Music
Admit
Relied
Would
Arts
Undergo
Performing
Taxpayer
Support
Attend
Rather
Taxpayers
More quotes by Dave Barry
Black Stache had no love for the Queen, no love for women of any sort, except for his ma. He had a real soft spot for his ma, and was truly sorry for the time he’d marooned her.
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As sensitive and broad-minded humans, we must never allow ourselves to be in any way judgmental of the religious practices of other people, even when these people clearly are raving space loons.
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The old system of having a baby was much better than the new system, the old system being characterized by the fact that the man didn't have to watch.
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Never trust anything you read in a travel article.
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Someone was tapping on the window.
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I don't like anything unsigned in a newspaper that purports to be the opinion of some group if we don't know who the group is. It's laughable to say that The Miami Herald's editorials or any newspaper's editorials represent any views other than those of the people writing them, so why don't we tell everybody who they are?
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My theory is that there is a finite amount of intelligence in a family, and you're supposed to gradually transfer it to your children over a period of many years. This is why your parents started to get so stupid just at the time in your life when you were getting really smart.
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What I need is a search engine that, no matter what I type in, comes back with GO BACK TO WORK.
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The badness of a movie is directly proportional to the number of helicopters in it.
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There is a very fine line between hobby and mental illness.
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Dogsled-riding is a sport that is relaxing as well as fragrant.
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To better understand why you need a personal computer, let's take a look at the pathetic mess you call your life.
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The story of the eighties will be the story of the Reagan administration and the many men and women who served in it, some of whom are already out on parole.
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Before going on a diet you should consult your doctor, or at least send him some money.
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