Quote

I have come up with a sure-fire concept for a hit television show, which would be called `A Live Celebrity Gets Eaten by a Shark'.

Dave Barry

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Dave Barry
Age: 77
Born: 1947
Born: July 3
Actor
Author
Columnist
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Satirist
Writer
Armonk (New York)
David McAlister Barry
David Barry
Show
Celebrity
Shows
Concept
Live
Concepts
Come
Gets
Would
Television
Fire
Shark
Called
Sharks
Sure
Eaten

More quotes by Dave Barry

Image
Seriously? You won’t help me?” “Help yourself get killed? No, I won’t.
Dave Barry
Image
Magnetism, as you recall from physics class, is a powerful force that causes certain items to be attracted to refrigerators.
Dave Barry
Image
Big business never pays a nickel in taxes, according to Ralph Nader, who represents a big consumer organization that never pays a nickel in taxes.
Dave Barry
Image
Smee! Raise the Ladies!
Dave Barry
Image
What was life like in the colonies? Probably the best word to describe it would be colonial.
Dave Barry
Image
This is true virtually all edible substances, and many automotive products, are now marketed as being low-fat or fat-free. Americans are obsessed with fat content.
Dave Barry
Image
Funny, isn't it? The airlines go to all that trouble to keep you from taking a gun on board, then they just hand you a dinner roll you could kill a musk ox with.
Dave Barry
Image
In South Florida, we have industrial cockroaches that have to be equipped with loud warning beepers so you can get out of their way when they back up.
Dave Barry
Image
If a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball and saving an infant's life, she will choose to save the infant's life without even considering if there are men on base.
Dave Barry
Image
I am a superior form of human and I have absolutely no quirks or irrational impulses of any kind.
Dave Barry
Image
In 1765, Parliament passed the Stamp Act, which, as any American high school student can tell you, was an act that apparently had something to do with stamps.
Dave Barry
Image
When Prince Charles speaks, everybody pretends to be fascinated, even though he has never said anything interesting except in that intercepted telephone conversation wherein he expressed the desire to be a feminine hygeine product.
Dave Barry
Image
I'm a big believer in anesthesia. I think it should be used for every medical procedure, indlucing routine physicals.
Dave Barry
Image
By the eighties, a lot of radio stations had started playing Sixties music. They called it Classic Rock, because they knew we'd be upset if they came right out and called it what it is, namely middle-aged-person nostalgia music.
Dave Barry
Image
At least once per year, some group of scientists will become very excited and announce that: •The universe is even bigger than they thought! •There are even more subatomic particles than they thought! •Whatever they announced last year about global warming is wrong.
Dave Barry
Image
When trouble arises and things look bad, there is always one individual who perceives a solution and is willing to take command. Very often, that individual is crazy.
Dave Barry
Image
I called a company and asked to speak to Bob. The person who answered said, Bob is on vacation. Would you like to hold?
Dave Barry
Image
It was not easy victory in the America Cup. Our boys spent years experimenting with different designs for their boat before they came up with the innovative idea of having a submerged nuclear submarine tow it.
Dave Barry
Image
All the shopping malls and restaurants and airports are riddled with low-fidelity loudspeakers, which apparently have developed the ability to reproduce by themselves these are all connected to a special programming service called Music That Nobody Really Likes, and you cannot get away from it.
Dave Barry
Image
Cats are independent, by which I mean smart.
Dave Barry