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Without good grammar, the United States would have lost World War II.

Dave Barry

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Dave Barry
Age: 77
Born: 1947
Born: July 3
Actor
Author
Columnist
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Satirist
Writer
Armonk (New York)
David McAlister Barry
David Barry
States
Without
Good
Would
World
Grammar
United
War
Lost

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The science fair has long been a favorite educational tool in the American school system, and for a good reason: Your teachers hate you.
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It's a real smug self-righteous punk kid saying nobody has the right to tell him what to do and how dare you put a sign up saying that I can't go on your property?
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Your friends love you anyway.
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Florida's number three industry, behind tourism and skin cancer, is voter fraud.
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Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza.
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The planes are crowded and noisy and late, and everybody hates everybody. If armed terrorists had tried to hijack any of the flights I've been on lately, we passengers would have swiftly beaten them to death with those hard rolls you get with your in-flight meals.
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As the saying goes: If you're not part of the solution, you're a newspaper columnist.
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Can we move this conversation along, I'm getting frightfully tired of 'hoa'.
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Tokyo is huge. Something like 15 million people live there, and my estimate is that at any given moment, 14.7 million of them are lost.
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Magnetism, as you recall from physics class, is a powerful force that causes certain items to be attracted to refrigerators.
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