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The most powerful force in the universe is gossip.

Dave Barry

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Dave Barry
Age: 77
Born: 1947
Born: July 3
Actor
Author
Columnist
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Satirist
Writer
Armonk (New York)
David McAlister Barry
David Barry
Compounds
Gossip
Civilization
Powerful
Interest
Universe
Force

More quotes by Dave Barry

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Granted, this system is insane, but we must not let sanity stand in the way of airport security.
Dave Barry
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Your digestive system is your body's Fun House, whereby food goes on a long, dark, scary ride, taking all kinds of unexpected twists and turns, being attacked by vicious secretions along the way, and not knowing until the last minute whether it will be turned into a useful body part or ejected into the Dark Hole by Mister Sphincter.
Dave Barry
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I also saw a huge expansion of the Internet, with many major corporations, afraid of being left behind, spending hundreds of millions of dollars to develop World Wide Web sites in a frantic scramble to reach the vast new consumer market of Web use
Dave Barry
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There comes a time in a man's life when he hears the call of the sea. If the man has a brain in his head, he will hang up the phone immediately.
Dave Barry
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The problem with winter sports is that - follow me closely here - they generally take place in winter.
Dave Barry
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If you have a big enough dictionary, just about everything is a word.
Dave Barry
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If for some reason you are unsure where to go, all you have to do is stand there looking lost, and within seconds a helpful New Yorker will approach to see if you have any spare change.
Dave Barry
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Hardware: This is the part of the computer that stops working when you spill beer on it.
Dave Barry
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Like many members of the uncultured, Cheez-It consuming public, I am not good at grasping modern art.
Dave Barry
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We believe that electricity exists, because the electric company keeps sending us bills for it, but we cannot figure out how it travels inside wires.
Dave Barry
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I can win an argument on any topic, against any opponent. People know this, and steer clear of me at parties. Often, as a sign of their great respect, they don't even invite me.
Dave Barry
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Orangutan are very weird animals but they look very soulful.
Dave Barry
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Experts agree that the best type of computer for your individual needs is one that comes on the market about two days after you actually purchase some other computer.
Dave Barry
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Although it was constructed in 1536, the New York subway system boasts an annual maintenance budget of nearly $8, currently stolen, and it does a remarkable job of getting New Yorkers from Point A to an indeterminate location somewhere in the tunnel leading to point B.
Dave Barry
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The world is full of strange phenomena that cannot be explained by the laws of logic or science. Dennis Rodman is only one example.
Dave Barry
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You have to be careful on the deck, because of the hatches, which are holes placed around a sailboat at random to increase the insurance rates.
Dave Barry
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If you look at photos of the Gettysburg Address there's a guy off to the right who I think is Keith Richards.
Dave Barry
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Avoid the traffic by using one of the park's shuttle buses and view the elk rut with a park ranger.
Dave Barry
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Although humans tend to view sex as mainly a fun recreational activity sometimes resulting in death, in nature it is a far more serious matter.
Dave Barry
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Dogsled-riding is a sport that is relaxing as well as fragrant.
Dave Barry