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I love the Olympics, because they enable people from all over the world to come together and--regardless of their political or cultural differences--accuse each other of cheating.

Dave Barry

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Dave Barry
Age: 77
Born: 1947
Born: July 3
Actor
Author
Columnist
Film Producer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Satirist
Writer
Armonk (New York)
David McAlister Barry
David Barry
People
Cultural
Differences
Sports
Political
Accuse
Together
Enable
Come
Cheating
Love
Olympics
World
Regardless

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Congress, after years of stalling, finally got around to clearing the way for informal discussions that might lead to possible formal talks that could potentially produce some kind of tenative agreements.
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You might have mentioned this to me Molly,” said Leonard. “The fact that there are hostile natives on the island.” “I forgot,” said Molly. “You forgot?” said Leonard. “There’s been a lot happening,” said Molly.
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We believe that electricity exists, because the electric company keeps sending us bills for it, but we cannot figure out how it travels inside wires.
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The whole thing about whether you smoke marijuana or not is so ridiculous. That and whether you protested the Vietnam War. Give me a break. Especially the marijuana thing.
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The Japanese tend to be far more co-operative and docile and group-oriented. It would be easier to get the entire population of Tokyo to wear matching outfits than to get any two randomly selected Americans to agree on pizza toppings.
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A small deer came into my camp and stole my bag of pickles. Is there a way I can get reimbursed? Please call.
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As a taxpayer, you are required to be fully in compliance with the United States Tax Code, which is currently the size and weight of the Budweiser Clydesdales.
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Trails need to be reconstructed. Please avoid building trails that go uphill.
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Megahertz: This is really, really big hertz.
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Like all writers, my greatest inspiration, my ultimate muse, is a deadline.
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Babies and Other Hazards of Sex: How to Make a Tiny Person in Only 9 Months, with Tools You Probably Have around the Home.
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Dogsled-riding is a sport that is relaxing as well as fragrant.
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Any parent that relies on any law to help him parent is an idiot.
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There are two kinds of solar-heat systems: passive systems collect the sunlight that hits your home, and active systems collect the sunlight that hits your neighbors' homes, too.
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I want a pit crew... I hate the procedure I currently have to go through when I have car problems.
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There are two kinds of people in this world, and I am one of them.
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The population of earth has reached 7 billion people, every single one of whom send you irritating emails to join something called LinkedIn.
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If everybody were a guy, the human race could easily get by on less than one twentieth the current number of shoes.
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If you explain so clearly that nobody can misunderstand, somebody will. If you're right 90% of the time, why quibble about the remaining 3%? In Africa some of the native tribes have a custom of beating the ground with clubs and uttering spine chilling cries. Anthropologists call this a form of primitive self-expression. In America we call it golf.
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The most powerful force in the universe is gossip.
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