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Sometimes. I get recognized, but I'm not really a famous famous. I'm pretty low on the showbiz totem pole - I mean, I'm no Jon or Kate plus eight. I'm just a comic, not a baby factory.

Dave Attell

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Dave Attell
Age: 59
Born: 1965
Born: January 18
Actor
Comedian
Television Actor
Rockville Centre
New York
Pretty
Factories
Sometimes
Recognized
Mean
Plus
Totem
Really
Famous
Totems
Comic
Showbiz
Lows
Pole
Eight
Kate
Baby
Factory

More quotes by Dave Attell

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So I took her back to my place and we did it doggy style, not because we planned it that way, but that's just how she passed out.
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I don't have a girlfriend but sometimes I like to pretend I do. I just stand in my apartment screaming No, that's not what I said!
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I gotta quit smoking, doctor's orders, and the drinking, court orders.
Dave Attell
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Everyone was laughin'. Even that deaf mute boy was breathing heavy and pointing at me. Which is laughter to their kind.
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I'm a joke comic. I tell jokes.
Dave Attell
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Are you shooting webs of stupid at me?
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If I had a kid, I'd give him a name that would make everyone would want to say his name. I'd call him, Pizza-Pussy-Santa. I would! Cause everybody likes one of those things.
Dave Attell
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I'm sitting in the bus station, minding my own business, reading 'Ta-Da!' magazine a magazine by and for gay magicians, but that's a different story.
Dave Attell
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If you go to Germany and get drunk, at some point you will try to look up Hitler in the phone book.
Dave Attell
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A joke is a joke, and people put too much meaning behind it. They react to it in the wrong way. I mean, you can boo or laugh, and that's pretty much what you're supposed to do with jokes. You're not supposed to take it any further than that.
Dave Attell
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If you take off your pants and her first reaction is, Awwww, look at it...like a little baby Jesus. Time to buy a Porsche.
Dave Attell
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You gotta make your own fun. That's right, listen to that mother of two, she knows what I'm talking about.
Dave Attell
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I'm not the comic of the generation, I'm not even the funniest guy in my family.
Dave Attell
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I have no grand scheme.
Dave Attell
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Sparklers are the gay cousins of the fireworks family.
Dave Attell
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I have an imagination because my life is so boring that my imagination lets me get off the reality of what's going on.
Dave Attell
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I like doing stand-up and I love putting out TV specials.
Dave Attell
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Is she crazy, like it says on her bracelet, or is she just looking at my sheets? I dunno!
Dave Attell
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I've never had a surprise birthday party. I've had every other type of surprise. I've had surprise beatings, surprise drug tests, surprise daughter I think.
Dave Attell
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You see a guy with one leg, he's got a story. Land mine '69. You see a guy with one arm, he's got a story, too. Snow blower, bottle of whiskey. You see a guy with one tooth, what would the story be? Well, uh, I like a lot of taffy.
Dave Attell