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Sometimes. I get recognized, but I'm not really a famous famous. I'm pretty low on the showbiz totem pole - I mean, I'm no Jon or Kate plus eight. I'm just a comic, not a baby factory.

Dave Attell

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Dave Attell
Age: 59
Born: 1965
Born: January 18
Actor
Comedian
Television Actor
Rockville Centre
New York
Eight
Kate
Baby
Factory
Pretty
Factories
Sometimes
Recognized
Mean
Plus
Totem
Really
Famous
Totems
Comic
Showbiz
Lows
Pole

More quotes by Dave Attell

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If you go to Germany and get drunk, at some point you will try to look up Hitler in the phone book.
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I feel like soundtrack music is almost like seeing the movie again, but with my ears.
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Aspirin will not bring dead hookers back to life.
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I don't watch reality TV.
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Remember when you're young and you think your dad is Superman? And then you grow up and realized he's just a drunk who wears a cape.
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I never wanted to be famous.
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I've never had a surprise birthday party. I've had every other type of surprise. I've had surprise beatings, surprise drug tests, surprise daughter I think.
Dave Attell
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If I was to have sex with one animal it would be a horse. That is a beautiful animal. And when you have sex with a horse, you know you always have a ride home.
Dave Attell
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A joke is a joke, and people put too much meaning behind it. They react to it in the wrong way. I mean, you can boo or laugh, and that's pretty much what you're supposed to do with jokes. You're not supposed to take it any further than that.
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I gotta quit smoking, doctor's orders, and the drinking, court orders.
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I like doing stand-up and I love putting out TV specials.
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Women have all the power because women have all the vaginas.
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I watch the Discovery Channel, and you know what I've discovered? I need a girlfriend.
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Sparklers are the gay cousins of the fireworks family.
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Jesse Joyce is a great writer.
Dave Attell
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I'm not the comic of the generation, I'm not even the funniest guy in my family.
Dave Attell
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Let's say you're in a situation where crystal meth can help you. Like, I don't know, you have too many teeth.
Dave Attell
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I have an imagination because my life is so boring that my imagination lets me get off the reality of what's going on.
Dave Attell
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It's a horrible economy but I'm trying to do my part. I just bought a new shower curtain it has all the presidents on it. Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with all the presidents staring at you? And when the water hits them it looks like they're crying.
Dave Attell
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I smoke so much. Three packs a day... I went to the bathroom, a camel came out of my ass.
Dave Attell