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I knew dating the son of Satan would turn out badly
Darynda Jones
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Darynda Jones
Age: 59
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Friona
Texas
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Badly
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Satan
Son
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More quotes by Darynda Jones
I'd have a longer attention span if there weren't so many shiny things.
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You can’t have him, okay,” she said from behind the wire barrier. “Mm-hmm,” I whispered. “This is certainly a beautiful neighborhood.” “Yeah, I guess.” “I will scratch those eyes out of your ugly head.
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You can't fix stupid, but you can numb it was a 2 by 4.--T-SHIRT
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Friends don't let friends get killed by serial killers
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Can I brush your hair?” she asked as she led the way, her disposition doing a 180 on a dime. Kids. Can’t live with ’em. Can’t eat ’em for lunch.
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I can hear other things, too. Before you came around, I had no idea a man could make a girl scream like that. Reyes seems very talented.
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Just in case, though, I stormed into my apartment, tossed a quick hello to Mr. Wong, then rummaged through my entertainment center to lay out all my exorcism equipment. I kept it in my entertainment center because exorcisms were nothing if not entertaining.
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I went down like a drunken cowgirl trying to line dance to Metallica.
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I love children, but I don't think I can eat a whole one.- Bumper sticker
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I may as well cut my losses and make a hasty exit while I still had enough self-esteem to walk upright. Crawling was so demoralizing
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He seemed determines, his resolve unwavering. This would take tact. Prudence. Possible Milk Duds.
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When I want your opinion, I'll remove the duct tape.--T-SHIRT
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Honestly, he acted as though he didn't like me anymore. Wait, maybe he didn't. Do you still like me? I never liked you. Oh, right. He had a point. Garreth & Charley
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Pretending to drink coffee was similar to faking an orgasm.
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Paperwork wouldn’t be so bad if it weren’t for all the paper. And the work.
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The police never find it as funny as you do.-T-Shirt
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Want coffee? I asked, as I headed that way. It's three thirty in the morning. Okay. Want coffee?
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Oh, and she told me that men want only one thing. And on that note, I must give praise and thanks to the powers that be. I don't want much else from them either.
Darynda Jones
I could be irksome when I put my left ventricle into it.
Darynda Jones
I noticed you tore down Donovan's house. He lifted his gaze until it locked with mine. He's alive because he left town. His house chose to stay. It paid the price.
Darynda Jones