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Does Uncle Bob have anything? I heard he has an STD. I mean on the women. Oh, I have no idea if they have any STDs.

Darynda Jones

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Darynda Jones
Age: 59
Author
Novelist
Writer
Friona
Texas
Women
Anything
Ideas
Uncle
Mean
Uncles
Bob
Heard
Idea
Doe

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Don't judge me because I'm quiet. No one plans a murder out loud.
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A sheriff arrested me. I could be mistaken, but I'm pretty sure my men-in-uniform fetish began that day. The sheriff was hot. And he handcuffed me. I've never been the same.
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Maybe I needed sensitivity training. I once signed up for an anger management class, but the instructor pissed me off.
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I know how you feel. I’ve been analyzed to death as well. Not, like, professionally, though I did date a psych major who said I had attention issues. Or at least that’s what I think he said. I wasn’t really paying attention. Anyway, where was I?
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The police never find it as funny as you do.-T-Shirt
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You take everything onto your shoulders like that guy who holds up the world, and you shouldn’t. You’re not nearly as muscular.
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There is a great need for a sarcasm font.
Darynda Jones
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That you honestly believe I am capable of hurting innocent people for no reason.” “You’re not?” I asked, hope softening my voice. “Oh, no, I’m more than capable. I just didn’t realize you knew that.
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I totally should've gone to Hogwarts when I had the chance.
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When I want your opinion, I'll remove the duct tape.--T-SHIRT
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I pointed in the general vicinity of my left ovary, This is Beam Me Up. Then to my right. And this is Scotty. Garret chuckled and buried his face in his hands. He asked.
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Honestly, he acted as though he didn't like me anymore. Wait, maybe he didn't. Do you still like me? I never liked you. Oh, right. He had a point. Garreth & Charley
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I noticed you tore down Donovan's house. He lifted his gaze until it locked with mine. He's alive because he left town. His house chose to stay. It paid the price.
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In Cookie's defense, it was raining wildcats and rabid dogs.
Darynda Jones
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I know, he said in almost bored contemplation. My manners suck. I like to chalk it up to a dissatisfying childhood. I'd chalk it up to that narcissistic personality disorder laces with a smidgen of schizophrenia. Your mother would be proud.
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―You realize I can hear you without the annoying intercom. Cookie and I both leaned forward and looked at each other through the doorway. ―But this is more fun, I said. ―More Star Trekkie.
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Chocolate and coffee ? Together ? Whoever came up with that combination should have won a Nobel Peace Prize. Or at least a subscription to Reader's Digest.
Darynda Jones
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Charley: If you‘re not going to tell me where you are, if you‘re not going to trust me to help you, then why are you here? Why bother? Reyes: Because you‘re the reason I breathe.
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I had yet to be a mother, but I would have thought it difficult to forget something it took thirty-seven hours of excruciating pain to push out from between my legs ~Charley Davidson
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My plans often went awry. Much like my thoughts. Hold the phones. Maybe Saan had ADD, too. It would explain a lot.
Darynda Jones