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Who is Dr. A. von Holstein? And is he related, by chance, to a race of cows?

Darynda Jones

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Darynda Jones
Age: 59
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Novelist
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Friona
Texas
Chance
Cows
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Race

More quotes by Darynda Jones

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Chocolate and coffee ? Together ? Whoever came up with that combination should have won a Nobel Peace Prize. Or at least a subscription to Reader's Digest.
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He bombarded me with words, of all things, apparently clueless to the fact that the predawn hours rendered me incapable of coherent thought.
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I often question my sanity. Occasionally, it replies.
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Have you slept yet?' 'Sure. I took a power nap on the way over.' 'Didn't you drive there?' 'Yeah. Other drviers kept waking me up. Car horns should be illegal.' - Charley & Cookie
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Nobody wants to look like a fool. Nine times out of ten, that reason alone keeps people from allowing themselves to believe.
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When life hands you lemons say, Lemons? What else have you got? - bumper sticker
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What do I look like, the ghost whisperer? They're loony. I'd have better luck talking to my cousin Alfonso's Chihuahua. At least Tía Juana knows Spanish. Your cousin's Chihuahua is named Tía Juana?
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You were the one who hit me on the roof? I hit you on the jaw. We just happened to be on a roof at the time.
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Ask me about my complete lack of interest. (T-shirt)
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I pointed in the general vicinity of my left ovary, This is Beam Me Up. Then to my right. And this is Scotty. Garret chuckled and buried his face in his hands. He asked.
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An integral part of any best friend's job is to immediately clear your computer history if you die.
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guys have feelings too. But like...who cares? -Inspirational poster
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I shifted in my chair as Dad waited for a response. He seemed determined, his resolve unwavering. This would take tact. Prudence. Possibly Milk Duds. “Are you psychotic?” I asked, realizing my plan to charm and bribe him if need be flew out the window the minute I opened my mouth.
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Mistakes were made. Others were blamed.
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It’s all fun and games until someone loses a testicle. —T-SHIRT
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That you honestly believe I am capable of hurting innocent people for no reason.” “You’re not?” I asked, hope softening my voice. “Oh, no, I’m more than capable. I just didn’t realize you knew that.
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Yeah, but what happens if life hands me pickles? - Bumper sticker
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Paperwork wouldn’t be so bad if it weren’t for all the paper. And the work.
Darynda Jones
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I'm a virgin. But this is an old shirt. --T-SHIRT
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Still, this whole grim reaper thing should have come with a manual. Or a diagram of some kind. A flowchart would have been nice.
Darynda Jones