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Who is Dr. A. von Holstein? And is he related, by chance, to a race of cows?
Darynda Jones
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Darynda Jones
Age: 59
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Friona
Texas
Cows
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Race
Chance
More quotes by Darynda Jones
I was just passing by. Saw the commotion. Figured you were involved.
Darynda Jones
I'd never taken to four foot creatures who had the uncanny ability to point out all my flaws in thirty second flat. And just for the record, I can too read without moving my lips.
Darynda Jones
I know, he said in almost bored contemplation. My manners suck. I like to chalk it up to a dissatisfying childhood. I'd chalk it up to that narcissistic personality disorder laces with a smidgen of schizophrenia. Your mother would be proud.
Darynda Jones
She still wasn't convinced. So, if you were a guy, would you be into me? Hon, if I were a guy, I'd be gay. Yeah, me, too.
Darynda Jones
I know how you feel. I’ve been analyzed to death as well. Not, like, professionally, though I did date a psych major who said I had attention issues. Or at least that’s what I think he said. I wasn’t really paying attention. Anyway, where was I?
Darynda Jones
He seemed determines, his resolve unwavering. This would take tact. Prudence. Possible Milk Duds.
Darynda Jones
There comes a moment when you know you just aren't going to do anything esle productive for the rest of the day.-T-Shirt
Darynda Jones
Pretending to drink coffee was similar to faking an orgasm.
Darynda Jones
Okay, I'll strip. I'll tap dance. I'll sing 'La Cucaracha' in C minor.
Darynda Jones
Man, that woman was quick when she wanted to be. But put her behind the wheel of a Buick.
Darynda Jones
―You realize I can hear you without the annoying intercom. Cookie and I both leaned forward and looked at each other through the doorway. ―But this is more fun, I said. ―More Star Trekkie.
Darynda Jones
guys have feelings too. But like...who cares? -Inspirational poster
Darynda Jones
I can hear other things, too. Before you came around, I had no idea a man could make a girl scream like that. Reyes seems very talented.
Darynda Jones
I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger. - T-SHIRT
Darynda Jones
Maybe I needed sensitivity training. I once signed up for an anger management class, but the instructor pissed me off.
Darynda Jones
Friends don't let friends get killed by serial killers
Darynda Jones
Rocket, I said, straightening in the chair. Donovan was just helping me with my contacts. Donovan raised his brows humorously. Rocket furrowed his. Did you swallow them?
Darynda Jones
See you in a few. Hold down the fort, Mr. Wong!
Darynda Jones
I meant to behave. There were just too many other options.--T-SHIRT
Darynda Jones
Yeah, but what happens if life hands me pickles? - Bumper sticker
Darynda Jones