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She still wasn't convinced. So, if you were a guy, would you be into me? Hon, if I were a guy, I'd be gay. Yeah, me, too.
Darynda Jones
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Darynda Jones
Age: 59
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Friona
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More quotes by Darynda Jones
I did that thing where you scratch your eyebrow and flip someone off at the same time. I'm good at multitasking like that.
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I may not have any skeletons in my closet, but I do have a little box of souls in my sock drawer. —T-SHIRT
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Have they even seen the Winchester boys? Sammy and Dean's existence proves there is a god and she is a woman.
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She blinked at me, then realized I was panicking. Honestly, it was like admitting to murder before being interrogated. “Ms. Davidson,” she began, but I decided to trip her up, to throw her off the trail of blood I’d left like an injured animal. “I don’t speak English.
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He seemed determines, his resolve unwavering. This would take tact. Prudence. Possible Milk Duds.
Darynda Jones
God I loved Sammy. I’d considered marrying him, but his wife got upset when I asked for his hand.
Darynda Jones
What's your specialty? Oh, you know. Madness. Mayhem. Debauchery. And even with all that going for me, I can still make a mean mojito.
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Want coffee? I asked, as I headed that way. It's three thirty in the morning. Okay. Want coffee?
Darynda Jones
SOME GIRLS WEAR PRADA. SOME GIRLS WEAR GLOCK 17 SHORT RECOIL SPRING-LOADED SEMIAUTOMATIC PISTOLS WITH A LOADED CHAMBER INDICATOR AND A NONSLIP GRIP. - T-SHIRT
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Surely my macking on some guy in an insane asylum wouldn't hurt him. He'd been living with his stalker, for heaven's sake.
Darynda Jones
When life hands you lemons say, Lemons? What else have you got? - bumper sticker
Darynda Jones
Don't judge me because I'm quiet. No one plans a murder out loud.
Darynda Jones
After a long, labored sigh, I said, “She was really happy when I got there. I’m pretty sure she was suicidal when I left.” “You do have that effect on people.
Darynda Jones
Then I asked her if she wanted to to the funeral, and my God, the look on her face. You'd think I'd asked her to drown the neighbor's cat. Admittedly, drowning the neighbor's cat didn't really clue me in as much as I would've liked. So, she was angry? He blinked back to me and stared. Like a long time.
Darynda Jones
His gaze slid over me like a veil of fire. He could ignite my deepest desires with a single glance. I decided right then and there no more reading romance novels by candelight.
Darynda Jones
If I couldn't be a good example, I'd just have to be a horrible warning.
Darynda Jones
I lowered the gun but didn’t holster it. Not just yet. She could turn out to be psychotic. Or a door-to-door salesperson.
Darynda Jones
I had yet to be a mother, but I would have thought it difficult to forget something it took thirty-seven hours of excruciating pain to push out from between my legs ~Charley Davidson
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Rocket, I said, straightening in the chair. Donovan was just helping me with my contacts. Donovan raised his brows humorously. Rocket furrowed his. Did you swallow them?
Darynda Jones
There comes a moment when you know you just aren't going to do anything esle productive for the rest of the day.-T-Shirt
Darynda Jones