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I may not have any skeletons in my closet, but I do have a little box of souls in my sock drawer. —T-SHIRT

Darynda Jones

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Darynda Jones
Age: 59
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Friona
Texas
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More quotes by Darynda Jones

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I had yet to be a mother, but I would have thought it difficult to forget something it took thirty-seven hours of excruciating pain to push out from between my legs ~Charley Davidson
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Man, that woman was quick when she wanted to be. But put her behind the wheel of a Buick.
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Come here often?' I asked instead, humoring no one but myself. So it was totally worth it.
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Then I asked her if she wanted to to the funeral, and my God, the look on her face. You'd think I'd asked her to drown the neighbor's cat. Admittedly, drowning the neighbor's cat didn't really clue me in as much as I would've liked. So, she was angry? He blinked back to me and stared. Like a long time.
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I totally should've gone to Hogwarts when I had the chance.
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He had given me so much information, I wanted some time to absorb it all, but I didn't want to leave him. Not like this. Not ever, as long as I lived. Or until I had to get back on the case. Whichever came first.
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How would you like your eggs? I tried. I really did. But I glanced at his crotch and it came out anyway. Fertilized?
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The police never find it as funny as you do.-T-Shirt
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The dead guy looked at me with wide eyes. “I can’t move my legs.” I snorted. “You can’t move your arms either, or your feet or your freaking eyelids. You’re dead.
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I like to see the glass as half full, hopefully of jack daniels.
Darynda Jones
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guys have feelings too. But like...who cares? -Inspirational poster
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.. an emergency stash of Thin Mints. Frickin' Girl Scouts. Those things were way to addictive. They had to be laced with crack. Charlie Davidson Fourth Grave Beneath my Feet
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He seemed determines, his resolve unwavering. This would take tact. Prudence. Possible Milk Duds.
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I pointed in the general vicinity of my left ovary, This is Beam Me Up. Then to my right. And this is Scotty. Garret chuckled and buried his face in his hands. He asked.
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Mistakes were made. Others were blamed.
Darynda Jones
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He said you sparkle like a newborn galaxy and have more attitude than a rich kid with his daddy's Porsche.
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Have you slept yet?' 'Sure. I took a power nap on the way over.' 'Didn't you drive there?' 'Yeah. Other drviers kept waking me up. Car horns should be illegal.' - Charley & Cookie
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Who knew that all this time the nectar of the Gods was in my va-jay-jay.
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Honestly, he acted as though he didn't like me anymore. Wait, maybe he didn't. Do you still like me? I never liked you. Oh, right. He had a point. Garreth & Charley
Darynda Jones
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SARC- was my second favorite -ASM word
Darynda Jones