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How would you like your eggs? I tried. I really did. But I glanced at his crotch and it came out anyway. Fertilized?

Darynda Jones

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Darynda Jones
Age: 59
Author
Novelist
Writer
Friona
Texas
Like
Crotch
Glanced
Eggs
Anyway
Tried
Came
Really
Would
Fertilized

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I know, he said in almost bored contemplation. My manners suck. I like to chalk it up to a dissatisfying childhood. I'd chalk it up to that narcissistic personality disorder laces with a smidgen of schizophrenia. Your mother would be proud.
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I sort of got off on making bad guys sweat. Which was not unlike my love of making good guys sweat, just by very different means.
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There was nothing like a trip to the gynecologist to make one feel just a little violated. Charley
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He's helped me a lot over the years. I'm sure he has. You scratch his back. He scratches yours. I have skin allergies. I'm itchy.
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She blinked at me, then realized I was panicking. Honestly, it was like admitting to murder before being interrogated. “Ms. Davidson,” she began, but I decided to trip her up, to throw her off the trail of blood I’d left like an injured animal. “I don’t speak English.
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I'd never taken to four foot creatures who had the uncanny ability to point out all my flaws in thirty second flat. And just for the record, I can too read without moving my lips.
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There comes a moment when you know you just aren't going to do anything esle productive for the rest of the day.-T-Shirt
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Let me express how much I don't care on a scale of one to bite me, the former detective said.
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It isn’t the fall that will kill you, but the sudden stop.
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But have you ever seen one?....They shook their heads. Not Physically, no. But if you look at this passage - Man, she liked that Bible. I'd read it and could definitely understand it's appeal, but I didn't have time for this.
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I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger. - T-SHIRT
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But, you're his son, I said, trying really hard to hate him. You're the son of Satan. Literally. And you are the stepdaughter of Denise Davidson. Wow. That was a bit harsh, but, Okay, point taken.
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He was like chocolate-covered heroin, and I was an addict through and through.
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I had yet to be a mother, but I would have thought it difficult to forget something it took thirty-seven hours of excruciating pain to push out from between my legs ~Charley Davidson
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Chocolate and coffee ? Together ? Whoever came up with that combination should have won a Nobel Peace Prize. Or at least a subscription to Reader's Digest.
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Mistakes were made. Others were blamed.
Darynda Jones