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I was just passing by. Saw the commotion. Figured you were involved.
Darynda Jones
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Darynda Jones
Age: 59
Author
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Friona
Texas
Involved
Commotion
Figured
Passings
Passing
Saws
More quotes by Darynda Jones
I was white. Chalk had more color than I did. And quite possibly more personality.
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Before I tell you, I have to know three things, I said. Okay. One, are you sitting down? Yes. Two, are you mentally stable? More than you'll ever be. Well, that was uncalled for. And three, how do you spell schizophrenia? What does that have to do with anything? Nothing. I just wanted to see if you'd tell me.
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Just in case, though, I stormed into my apartment, tossed a quick hello to Mr. Wong, then rummaged through my entertainment center to lay out all my exorcism equipment. I kept it in my entertainment center because exorcisms were nothing if not entertaining.
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A sheriff arrested me. I could be mistaken, but I'm pretty sure my men-in-uniform fetish began that day. The sheriff was hot. And he handcuffed me. I've never been the same.
Darynda Jones
If I was going to go out tonight, I was going to go out fighting. Or screaming in agony. Either way.
Darynda Jones
When I want your opinion, I'll remove the duct tape.--T-SHIRT
Darynda Jones
You can’t have him, okay,” she said from behind the wire barrier. “Mm-hmm,” I whispered. “This is certainly a beautiful neighborhood.” “Yeah, I guess.” “I will scratch those eyes out of your ugly head.
Darynda Jones
I totally should've gone to Hogwarts when I had the chance.
Darynda Jones
The dead guy looked at me with wide eyes. “I can’t move my legs.” I snorted. “You can’t move your arms either, or your feet or your freaking eyelids. You’re dead.
Darynda Jones
I often question my sanity. Occasionally, it replies.
Darynda Jones
Glitch was about as wild and unpredictable as a carrot stick.
Darynda Jones
Friends don't let friends get killed by serial killers
Darynda Jones
I noticed you tore down Donovan's house. He lifted his gaze until it locked with mine. He's alive because he left town. His house chose to stay. It paid the price.
Darynda Jones
The police never find it as funny as you do.-T-Shirt
Darynda Jones
He was like chocolate-covered heroin, and I was an addict through and through.
Darynda Jones
After a long, labored sigh, I said, “She was really happy when I got there. I’m pretty sure she was suicidal when I left.” “You do have that effect on people.
Darynda Jones
Life is not about finding yourself. It's mostly about chocolate. T-Shirt
Darynda Jones
An integral part of any best friend's job is to immediately clear your computer history if you die.
Darynda Jones
What do I look like, the ghost whisperer? They're loony. I'd have better luck talking to my cousin Alfonso's Chihuahua. At least Tía Juana knows Spanish. Your cousin's Chihuahua is named Tía Juana?
Darynda Jones
Reyes leaned back against the bar, crossed his arms over his chest, and studied me from beneath those same ridiculously long lashes. Men and their freaking lashes. It was so unfair. Like the exorbitant cost of designer shoes. Or world hunger.
Darynda Jones