Quote

Pretending to drink coffee was similar to faking an orgasm.

Darynda Jones

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Darynda Jones
Age: 59
Author
Novelist
Writer
Friona
Texas
Similar
Coffee
Drink
Orgasm
Faking
Pretending

More quotes by Darynda Jones

Image
She blinked at me, then realized I was panicking. Honestly, it was like admitting to murder before being interrogated. “Ms. Davidson,” she began, but I decided to trip her up, to throw her off the trail of blood I’d left like an injured animal. “I don’t speak English.
Darynda Jones
Image
I did that thing where you scratch your eyebrow and flip someone off at the same time. I'm good at multitasking like that.
Darynda Jones
Image
Man, I want to be someone's forbidden fruit. Well, you are pretty fruity.
Darynda Jones
Image
I often question my sanity. Occasionally, it replies.
Darynda Jones
Image
But, you're his son, I said, trying really hard to hate him. You're the son of Satan. Literally. And you are the stepdaughter of Denise Davidson. Wow. That was a bit harsh, but, Okay, point taken.
Darynda Jones
Image
You’re just using me for my body.” “You don’t have a body,” I’d remind him. “Throw that in my face.” “Technically, you don’t have a face either.
Darynda Jones
Image
Let me express how much I don't care on a scale of one to bite me, the former detective said.
Darynda Jones
Image
When fighting clowns, always go for the juggler.
Darynda Jones
Image
What's your specialty? Oh, you know. Madness. Mayhem. Debauchery. And even with all that going for me, I can still make a mean mojito.
Darynda Jones
Image
Who is Dr. A. von Holstein? And is he related, by chance, to a race of cows?
Darynda Jones
Image
I chose the road less traveled. Now I'm lost.
Darynda Jones
Image
I may as well cut my losses and make a hasty exit while I still had enough self-esteem to walk upright. Crawling was so demoralizing
Darynda Jones
Image
My powers of persuasion are only as strong as the bullshit I have to back it up. - Charley Davidson
Darynda Jones
Image
Does Uncle Bob have anything? I heard he has an STD. I mean on the women. Oh, I have no idea if they have any STDs.
Darynda Jones
Image
Insanity does NOT run in my family. It strolls through, takes it's time, and gets to know everyone personally - T-Shirt
Darynda Jones
Image
I'm a virgin. But this is an old shirt. --T-SHIRT
Darynda Jones
Image
It’s all fun and games until someone loses a testicle. —T-SHIRT
Darynda Jones
Image
Death comes to those who wait. And to those who don't. So either way.
Darynda Jones
Image
You can't fix stupid, but you can numb it was a 2 by 4.--T-SHIRT
Darynda Jones
Image
I was just passing by. Saw the commotion. Figured you were involved.
Darynda Jones