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Reyes Farrow. Because perfection is a dirty job, but someone has to do it.

Darynda Jones

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Darynda Jones
Age: 59
Author
Novelist
Writer
Friona
Texas
Farrow
Reyes
Dirty
Perfection
Jobs
Someone

More quotes by Darynda Jones

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Who knew that all this time the nectar of the Gods was in my va-jay-jay.
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It’s all fun and games until someone loses a testicle. —T-SHIRT
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After a geological epoch passed in which single-celled organisms evolved into talk show hosts, Mr. Coffee was still holding out on me.
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You take everything onto your shoulders like that guy who holds up the world, and you shouldn’t. You’re not nearly as muscular.
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The point is, stories can be all lengths. Never underestimate the power of “less is more.
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Does Uncle Bob have anything? I heard he has an STD. I mean on the women. Oh, I have no idea if they have any STDs.
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I may as well cut my losses and make a hasty exit while I still had enough self-esteem to walk upright. Crawling was so demoralizing
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I was just passing by. Saw the commotion. Figured you were involved.
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He's helped me a lot over the years. I'm sure he has. You scratch his back. He scratches yours. I have skin allergies. I'm itchy.
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Mistakes were made. Others were blamed.
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I often question my sanity. Occasionally, it replies.
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SARC- was my second favorite -ASM word
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An integral part of any best friend's job is to immediately clear your computer history if you die.
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My real mom died when I was born—hemorrhaged to death while giving birth to me, which has never been one of my favorite memories—and Dad married Denise before I’d turned a year. Without even asking my opinion on the matter. Denise and I never really clicked.
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Okay, I’ll put someone on it. But you know, the Albuquerque Police Department wasn’t really created to find things out for you.” “Really? That’s weird.
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There is a great need for a sarcasm font.
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I went down like a drunken cowgirl trying to line dance to Metallica.
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The funny thing about GPS was it didn’t always send you in the right direction. I knew that if I took a right and took Twelfth instead, I’d get there faster, so I turned right. Ozzy did not approve. “Wut the foock?
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I knew dating the son of Satan would turn out badly
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Just in case, though, I stormed into my apartment, tossed a quick hello to Mr. Wong, then rummaged through my entertainment center to lay out all my exorcism equipment. I kept it in my entertainment center because exorcisms were nothing if not entertaining.
Darynda Jones