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“Time-out,” I said... He twisted his hand around and wound his fingers into mine. “You‘re putting me in time-out?” “Yes,” I said as a shaky sigh slid through my lips. “If I don't go, do I get a spanking?”
Darynda Jones
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Darynda Jones
Age: 59
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Friona
Texas
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Putting
Lips
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More quotes by Darynda Jones
When life hands you lemons say, Lemons? What else have you got? - bumper sticker
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Who knew that all this time the nectar of the Gods was in my va-jay-jay.
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Insanity does NOT run in my family. It strolls through, takes it's time, and gets to know everyone personally - T-Shirt
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I was just passing by. Saw the commotion. Figured you were involved.
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I often question my sanity. Occasionally, it replies.
Darynda Jones
Come here often?' I asked instead, humoring no one but myself. So it was totally worth it.
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I was white. Chalk had more color than I did. And quite possibly more personality.
Darynda Jones
If life hands you lemons,keep them. Because, hey, free lemons.-T-Shirt
Darynda Jones
Charley: If you‘re not going to tell me where you are, if you‘re not going to trust me to help you, then why are you here? Why bother? Reyes: Because you‘re the reason I breathe.
Darynda Jones
After a long, labored sigh, I said, “She was really happy when I got there. I’m pretty sure she was suicidal when I left.” “You do have that effect on people.
Darynda Jones
I meant to behave. There were just too many other options.--T-SHIRT
Darynda Jones
How would you like your eggs? I tried. I really did. But I glanced at his crotch and it came out anyway. Fertilized?
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Death comes to those who wait. And to those who don't. So either way.
Darynda Jones
The funny thing about GPS was it didn’t always send you in the right direction. I knew that if I took a right and took Twelfth instead, I’d get there faster, so I turned right. Ozzy did not approve. “Wut the foock?
Darynda Jones
See you in a few. Hold down the fort, Mr. Wong!
Darynda Jones
A Nuns Life: Chastity, poverty, and obedience. Wait, chastity? BUMPER STICKER
Darynda Jones
There is nothing to fear but fear itself. And spiders. ~Bumper sticker~
Darynda Jones
My real mom died when I was born—hemorrhaged to death while giving birth to me, which has never been one of my favorite memories—and Dad married Denise before I’d turned a year. Without even asking my opinion on the matter. Denise and I never really clicked.
Darynda Jones
The police never find it as funny as you do.-T-Shirt
Darynda Jones
She still wasn't convinced. So, if you were a guy, would you be into me? Hon, if I were a guy, I'd be gay. Yeah, me, too.
Darynda Jones