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A Nuns Life: Chastity, poverty, and obedience. Wait, chastity? BUMPER STICKER
Darynda Jones
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Darynda Jones
Age: 59
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Friona
Texas
Wait
Poverty
Waiting
Nuns
Life
Sticker
Bumper
Nun
Chastity
Obedience
More quotes by Darynda Jones
Give it up? Not likely. Besides, what else would I do? I totally should have gone to Hogwart's when I had the chance.
Darynda Jones
We stood there, the three of us, our jaws firmly planted on the floor. Aunt Lil recovered first. She nudged me with her elbow and said with a cackle of delight, I think you guys should make some more of those brownies, 'cause that boy looks hungry.
Darynda Jones
I know, he said in almost bored contemplation. My manners suck. I like to chalk it up to a dissatisfying childhood. I'd chalk it up to that narcissistic personality disorder laces with a smidgen of schizophrenia. Your mother would be proud.
Darynda Jones
Does Uncle Bob have anything? I heard he has an STD. I mean on the women. Oh, I have no idea if they have any STDs.
Darynda Jones
But we'd never really seen eye to eye. Mostly 'cause he was much taller than I was.
Darynda Jones
I chose the road less traveled. Now I'm lost.
Darynda Jones
Then I asked her if she wanted to to the funeral, and my God, the look on her face. You'd think I'd asked her to drown the neighbor's cat. Admittedly, drowning the neighbor's cat didn't really clue me in as much as I would've liked. So, she was angry? He blinked back to me and stared. Like a long time.
Darynda Jones
Drink coffee! Do stupid things faster and with more energy!
Darynda Jones
The point is, stories can be all lengths. Never underestimate the power of “less is more.
Darynda Jones
She didn't smile back. Not even a little. I totally needed to read that book on how to win friends and influence people. But that would involve an innate desire to win friends and influence people.
Darynda Jones
I climbed into Misery and called Uncle Bob. “We hooking up?” “Why does everything out of your mouth make me sound incestuous?” “Um, I wasn’t aware that it did. Perhaps you have a guilty conscience.” “Charley.” “Is there something you need to get off your chest? Besides that skank I saw you with the other day?
Darynda Jones
What do I look like, the ghost whisperer? They're loony. I'd have better luck talking to my cousin Alfonso's Chihuahua. At least Tía Juana knows Spanish. Your cousin's Chihuahua is named Tía Juana?
Darynda Jones
An integral part of any best friend's job is to immediately clear your computer history if you die.
Darynda Jones
Can I brush your hair?” she asked as she led the way, her disposition doing a 180 on a dime. Kids. Can’t live with ’em. Can’t eat ’em for lunch.
Darynda Jones
I had yet to be a mother, but I would have thought it difficult to forget something it took thirty-seven hours of excruciating pain to push out from between my legs ~Charley Davidson
Darynda Jones
SARC- was my second favorite -ASM word
Darynda Jones
Man, I want to be someone's forbidden fruit. Well, you are pretty fruity.
Darynda Jones
Felt my heartbeat falter, hesitate, then stumble awkwardly forward, tripping on the next beat, then the next, faster and faster until each one tumbled into the other like the drumroll of dominoes crashing together. Funny how time stands still when death is imminent.
Darynda Jones
Come here often?' I asked instead, humoring no one but myself. So it was totally worth it.
Darynda Jones
He had threatened my parents. I had to remember that. Still, it was really hard to stay mad at a wounded naked man.
Darynda Jones