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Life is not about finding yourself. It's mostly about chocolate. T-Shirt
Darynda Jones
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Darynda Jones
Age: 59
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Friona
Texas
Chocolate
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Mostly
Findings
Finding
Life
Shirt
More quotes by Darynda Jones
I was white. Chalk had more color than I did. And quite possibly more personality.
Darynda Jones
He’d actually hit me! It didn’t matter that hitting me wasn’t really like hitting a regular girl and I’d be completely healed in a matter of hours. I was still a freaking girl, and he damned well knew it. I’d just have to hit him back. With a lead pipe. Or an eighteen-wheeler.
Darynda Jones
I could hardly be responsible for my actions when everyone around me gave me every opportunity to sink to their low expectations.
Darynda Jones
If it weren’t for physics and law enforcement, I’d be unstoppable.
Darynda Jones
Having Reyes so near is painful. I think it has apoplexy. Do you even know what that means? No, but it sounds serious. Like Ebola. Or hives
Darynda Jones
Glitch was about as wild and unpredictable as a carrot stick.
Darynda Jones
Who knew that all this time the nectar of the Gods was in my va-jay-jay.
Darynda Jones
I'm a virgin. But this is an old shirt. --T-SHIRT
Darynda Jones
A sheriff arrested me. I could be mistaken, but I'm pretty sure my men-in-uniform fetish began that day. The sheriff was hot. And he handcuffed me. I've never been the same.
Darynda Jones
Still, this whole grim reaper thing should have come with a manual. Or a diagram of some kind. A flowchart would have been nice.
Darynda Jones
Ask me about my complete lack of interest. (T-shirt)
Darynda Jones
Man, that woman was quick when she wanted to be. But put her behind the wheel of a Buick.
Darynda Jones
You’re just using me for my body.” “You don’t have a body,” I’d remind him. “Throw that in my face.” “Technically, you don’t have a face either.
Darynda Jones
In Cookie's defense, it was raining wildcats and rabid dogs.
Darynda Jones
“Time-out,” I said... He twisted his hand around and wound his fingers into mine. “You‘re putting me in time-out?” “Yes,” I said as a shaky sigh slid through my lips. “If I don't go, do I get a spanking?”
Darynda Jones
You take everything onto your shoulders like that guy who holds up the world, and you shouldn’t. You’re not nearly as muscular.
Darynda Jones
Who is Dr. A. von Holstein? And is he related, by chance, to a race of cows?
Darynda Jones
Rocket, I said, straightening in the chair. Donovan was just helping me with my contacts. Donovan raised his brows humorously. Rocket furrowed his. Did you swallow them?
Darynda Jones
He's helped me a lot over the years. I'm sure he has. You scratch his back. He scratches yours. I have skin allergies. I'm itchy.
Darynda Jones
Just in case, though, I stormed into my apartment, tossed a quick hello to Mr. Wong, then rummaged through my entertainment center to lay out all my exorcism equipment. I kept it in my entertainment center because exorcisms were nothing if not entertaining.
Darynda Jones