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Insanity does NOT run in my family. It strolls through, takes it's time, and gets to know everyone personally - T-Shirt

Darynda Jones

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Darynda Jones
Age: 59
Author
Novelist
Writer
Friona
Texas
Takes
Family
Everyone
Running
Shirt
Doe
Insanity
Time
Shirts
Personally
Gets

More quotes by Darynda Jones

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Pretending to drink coffee was similar to faking an orgasm.
Darynda Jones
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Does Uncle Bob have anything? I heard he has an STD. I mean on the women. Oh, I have no idea if they have any STDs.
Darynda Jones
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SARC- was my second favorite -ASM word
Darynda Jones
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I was white. Chalk had more color than I did. And quite possibly more personality.
Darynda Jones
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I may as well cut my losses and make a hasty exit while I still had enough self-esteem to walk upright. Crawling was so demoralizing
Darynda Jones
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I could hardly be responsible for my actions when everyone around me gave me every opportunity to sink to their low expectations.
Darynda Jones
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Have you slept yet?' 'Sure. I took a power nap on the way over.' 'Didn't you drive there?' 'Yeah. Other drviers kept waking me up. Car horns should be illegal.' - Charley & Cookie
Darynda Jones
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I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger. - T-SHIRT
Darynda Jones
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What do I look like, the ghost whisperer? They're loony. I'd have better luck talking to my cousin Alfonso's Chihuahua. At least Tía Juana knows Spanish. Your cousin's Chihuahua is named Tía Juana?
Darynda Jones
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Dead people I could handle. They were usually beyond hysteria. This was the people-left behind part. The hard part.
Darynda Jones
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Don't judge me because I'm quiet. No one plans a murder out loud.
Darynda Jones
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Hello? I said, because Charley's House of Pasties seemed wrong.
Darynda Jones
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You can’t have him, okay,” she said from behind the wire barrier. “Mm-hmm,” I whispered. “This is certainly a beautiful neighborhood.” “Yeah, I guess.” “I will scratch those eyes out of your ugly head.
Darynda Jones
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Drink coffee! Do stupid things faster and with more energy!
Darynda Jones
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He said you sparkle like a newborn galaxy and have more attitude than a rich kid with his daddy's Porsche.
Darynda Jones
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See you in a few. Hold down the fort, Mr. Wong!
Darynda Jones
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I went down like a drunken cowgirl trying to line dance to Metallica.
Darynda Jones
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―You realize I can hear you without the annoying intercom. Cookie and I both leaned forward and looked at each other through the doorway. ―But this is more fun, I said. ―More Star Trekkie.
Darynda Jones
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I lowered the gun but didn’t holster it. Not just yet. She could turn out to be psychotic. Or a door-to-door salesperson.
Darynda Jones
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The point is, stories can be all lengths. Never underestimate the power of “less is more.
Darynda Jones