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Insanity does NOT run in my family. It strolls through, takes it's time, and gets to know everyone personally - T-Shirt

Darynda Jones

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Darynda Jones
Age: 59
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Friona
Texas
Time
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Personally
Gets
Takes
Family
Everyone
Running
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Doe
Insanity

More quotes by Darynda Jones

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Just in case, though, I stormed into my apartment, tossed a quick hello to Mr. Wong, then rummaged through my entertainment center to lay out all my exorcism equipment. I kept it in my entertainment center because exorcisms were nothing if not entertaining.
Darynda Jones
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Surely my macking on some guy in an insane asylum wouldn't hurt him. He'd been living with his stalker, for heaven's sake.
Darynda Jones
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That boy needs a hobby. Stalking is a hobby. So is serial killing.
Darynda Jones
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He's helped me a lot over the years. I'm sure he has. You scratch his back. He scratches yours. I have skin allergies. I'm itchy.
Darynda Jones
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Drink coffee! Do stupid things faster and with more energy!
Darynda Jones
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I often question my sanity. Occasionally, it replies.
Darynda Jones
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How would you like your eggs? I tried. I really did. But I glanced at his crotch and it came out anyway. Fertilized?
Darynda Jones
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“Time-out,” I said... He twisted his hand around and wound his fingers into mine. “You‘re putting me in time-out?” “Yes,” I said as a shaky sigh slid through my lips. “If I don't go, do I get a spanking?”
Darynda Jones
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His gaze slid over me like a veil of fire. He could ignite my deepest desires with a single glance. I decided right then and there no more reading romance novels by candelight.
Darynda Jones
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This place is like crazy on crackers.
Darynda Jones
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I sort of got off on making bad guys sweat. Which was not unlike my love of making good guys sweat, just by very different means.
Darynda Jones
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If life hands you lemons,keep them. Because, hey, free lemons.-T-Shirt
Darynda Jones
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My prodding me didn't elicit a reaction. His unseeing eyes stared straight through me. Which was odd. He'd seemed so sane huddled in Cookie's trunk.
Darynda Jones
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Apparently, this really was Kill Charley Davidson Week. Or at least Horribly Maim Her.... It would probably never get government recognition, though, destined to be underappreciated like Halloween or Thesaurus Day.
Darynda Jones
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Life is not about finding yourself. It's mostly about chocolate. T-Shirt
Darynda Jones
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It’s all fun and games until someone loses a testicle. —T-SHIRT
Darynda Jones
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I'd have a longer attention span if there weren't so many shiny things.
Darynda Jones
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Pretending to drink coffee was similar to faking an orgasm.
Darynda Jones
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You take everything onto your shoulders like that guy who holds up the world, and you shouldn’t. You’re not nearly as muscular.
Darynda Jones
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Okay, I'll strip. I'll tap dance. I'll sing 'La Cucaracha' in C minor.
Darynda Jones