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Insanity does NOT run in my family. It strolls through, takes it's time, and gets to know everyone personally - T-Shirt

Darynda Jones

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Darynda Jones
Age: 59
Author
Novelist
Writer
Friona
Texas
Doe
Insanity
Time
Shirts
Personally
Gets
Takes
Family
Everyone
Running
Shirt

More quotes by Darynda Jones

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Whatever makes your balloon red, Swopes.
Darynda Jones
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See you in a few. Hold down the fort, Mr. Wong!
Darynda Jones
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Drink coffee! Do stupid things faster and with more energy!
Darynda Jones
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I noticed you tore down Donovan's house. He lifted his gaze until it locked with mine. He's alive because he left town. His house chose to stay. It paid the price.
Darynda Jones
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You can’t have him, okay,” she said from behind the wire barrier. “Mm-hmm,” I whispered. “This is certainly a beautiful neighborhood.” “Yeah, I guess.” “I will scratch those eyes out of your ugly head.
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I totally should've gone to Hogwarts when I had the chance.
Darynda Jones
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I'm a virgin. But this is an old shirt. --T-SHIRT
Darynda Jones
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Felt my heartbeat falter, hesitate, then stumble awkwardly forward, tripping on the next beat, then the next, faster and faster until each one tumbled into the other like the drumroll of dominoes crashing together. Funny how time stands still when death is imminent.
Darynda Jones
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There was nothing like a trip to the gynecologist to make one feel just a little violated. Charley
Darynda Jones
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Reyes leaned back against the bar, crossed his arms over his chest, and studied me from beneath those same ridiculously long lashes. Men and their freaking lashes. It was so unfair. Like the exorbitant cost of designer shoes. Or world hunger.
Darynda Jones
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What did one say to a stalker? Um, pardon me, Mr.Stalker, but could you, like, not?
Darynda Jones
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Who is Dr. A. von Holstein? And is he related, by chance, to a race of cows?
Darynda Jones
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It isn’t the fall that will kill you, but the sudden stop.
Darynda Jones
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Hey, I'm going to Super Dog for a quick bite and to pass along a message from a dead guy to his girlfriend. You should come with me. I can't go with you. Is it because of my questionable morals? No, it's because it's three o'clock in the afternoon and I have to pick up Amber from school. Oh, right. So the morals thing doesn't bothe
Darynda Jones
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.. an emergency stash of Thin Mints. Frickin' Girl Scouts. Those things were way to addictive. They had to be laced with crack. Charlie Davidson Fourth Grave Beneath my Feet
Darynda Jones
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I lowered the gun but didn’t holster it. Not just yet. She could turn out to be psychotic. Or a door-to-door salesperson.
Darynda Jones
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Honestly, he acted as though he didn't like me anymore. Wait, maybe he didn't. Do you still like me? I never liked you. Oh, right. He had a point. Garreth & Charley
Darynda Jones
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I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger. - T-SHIRT
Darynda Jones
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After a geological epoch passed in which single-celled organisms evolved into talk show hosts, Mr. Coffee was still holding out on me.
Darynda Jones
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He was like chocolate-covered heroin, and I was an addict through and through.
Darynda Jones