Quote

What did one say to a stalker? Um, pardon me, Mr.Stalker, but could you, like, not?

Darynda Jones

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Darynda Jones
Age: 59
Author
Novelist
Writer
Friona
Texas
Stalker
Pardon
Like

More quotes by Darynda Jones

Image
Where you just possessed? Cookie asked after a long moment, awe softening her voice. 'Cause let me tell you, sweetheart, if that was possession, I'm selling my soul.
Darynda Jones
Image
He had given me so much information, I wanted some time to absorb it all, but I didn't want to leave him. Not like this. Not ever, as long as I lived. Or until I had to get back on the case. Whichever came first.
Darynda Jones
Image
She shook her head then took off again, and I found myself struggling to keep up with her in my bunny slippers. With a sigh, I realized I was getting way too much exercise. I'd just have to counteract it later with cake.
Darynda Jones
Image
My prodding me didn't elicit a reaction. His unseeing eyes stared straight through me. Which was odd. He'd seemed so sane huddled in Cookie's trunk.
Darynda Jones
Image
Come here often?' I asked instead, humoring no one but myself. So it was totally worth it.
Darynda Jones
Image
See you in a few. Hold down the fort, Mr. Wong!
Darynda Jones
Image
Still, this whole grim reaper thing should have come with a manual. Or a diagram of some kind. A flowchart would have been nice.
Darynda Jones
Image
If I couldn't be a good example, I'd just have to be a horrible warning.
Darynda Jones
Image
I shifted in my chair as Dad waited for a response. He seemed determined, his resolve unwavering. This would take tact. Prudence. Possibly Milk Duds. “Are you psychotic?” I asked, realizing my plan to charm and bribe him if need be flew out the window the minute I opened my mouth.
Darynda Jones
Image
Whatever makes your balloon red, Swopes.
Darynda Jones
Image
We stood there, the three of us, our jaws firmly planted on the floor. Aunt Lil recovered first. She nudged me with her elbow and said with a cackle of delight, I think you guys should make some more of those brownies, 'cause that boy looks hungry.
Darynda Jones
Image
It’s all fun and games until someone loses a testicle. —T-SHIRT
Darynda Jones
Image
Friends don't let friends get killed by serial killers
Darynda Jones
Image
SOME GIRLS WEAR PRADA. SOME GIRLS WEAR GLOCK 17 SHORT RECOIL SPRING-LOADED SEMIAUTOMATIC PISTOLS WITH A LOADED CHAMBER INDICATOR AND A NONSLIP GRIP. - T-SHIRT
Darynda Jones
Image
I meant to behave. There were just too many other options.--T-SHIRT
Darynda Jones
Image
He was like chocolate-covered heroin, and I was an addict through and through.
Darynda Jones
Image
I went down like a drunken cowgirl trying to line dance to Metallica.
Darynda Jones
Image
I can hear other things, too. Before you came around, I had no idea a man could make a girl scream like that. Reyes seems very talented.
Darynda Jones
Image
The funny thing about GPS was it didn’t always send you in the right direction. I knew that if I took a right and took Twelfth instead, I’d get there faster, so I turned right. Ozzy did not approve. “Wut the foock?
Darynda Jones
Image
I’m Charlotte Davidson: private investigator, police consultant, all -around badass. Or I could’ve been a badass, had I stuck with those lessons in mixed martial arts. I was only in that class to learn how to kill people with paper.
Darynda Jones