Quote

Glitch was about as wild and unpredictable as a carrot stick.

Darynda Jones

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Darynda Jones
Age: 59
Author
Novelist
Writer
Friona
Texas
Sticks
Wild
Glitch
Glitches
Carrot
Carrots
Unpredictable
Stick

More quotes by Darynda Jones

Image
You’re the reason I breathe
Darynda Jones
Image
After a long, labored sigh, I said, “She was really happy when I got there. I’m pretty sure she was suicidal when I left.” “You do have that effect on people.
Darynda Jones
Image
Okay, I’ll put someone on it. But you know, the Albuquerque Police Department wasn’t really created to find things out for you.” “Really? That’s weird.
Darynda Jones
Image
When fighting clowns, always go for the juggler.
Darynda Jones
Image
Nobody wants to look like a fool. Nine times out of ten, that reason alone keeps people from allowing themselves to believe.
Darynda Jones
Image
Then I asked her if she wanted to to the funeral, and my God, the look on her face. You'd think I'd asked her to drown the neighbor's cat. Admittedly, drowning the neighbor's cat didn't really clue me in as much as I would've liked. So, she was angry? He blinked back to me and stared. Like a long time.
Darynda Jones
Image
Maybe I needed sensitivity training. I once signed up for an anger management class, but the instructor pissed me off.
Darynda Jones
Image
How would you like your eggs? I tried. I really did. But I glanced at his crotch and it came out anyway. Fertilized?
Darynda Jones
Image
I know, he said in almost bored contemplation. My manners suck. I like to chalk it up to a dissatisfying childhood. I'd chalk it up to that narcissistic personality disorder laces with a smidgen of schizophrenia. Your mother would be proud.
Darynda Jones
Image
That boy needs a hobby. Stalking is a hobby. So is serial killing.
Darynda Jones
Image
I often question my sanity. Occasionally, it replies.
Darynda Jones
Image
Ask me about my complete lack of interest. (T-shirt)
Darynda Jones
Image
SARC- was my second favorite -ASM word
Darynda Jones
Image
Who is Dr. A. von Holstein? And is he related, by chance, to a race of cows?
Darynda Jones
Image
Death comes to those who wait. And to those who don't. So either way.
Darynda Jones
Image
Have you slept yet?' 'Sure. I took a power nap on the way over.' 'Didn't you drive there?' 'Yeah. Other drviers kept waking me up. Car horns should be illegal.' - Charley & Cookie
Darynda Jones
Image
guys have feelings too. But like...who cares? -Inspirational poster
Darynda Jones
Image
Friends don't let friends get killed by serial killers
Darynda Jones
Image
I'd never taken to four foot creatures who had the uncanny ability to point out all my flaws in thirty second flat. And just for the record, I can too read without moving my lips.
Darynda Jones
Image
He’d actually hit me! It didn’t matter that hitting me wasn’t really like hitting a regular girl and I’d be completely healed in a matter of hours. I was still a freaking girl, and he damned well knew it. I’d just have to hit him back. With a lead pipe. Or an eighteen-wheeler.
Darynda Jones